Am I missing out?
I'm sixteen and I've never had a boyfriend or girlfriend. I've never even kissed someone, let alone lost my virginity. I'm not embarrassed about it either. It's not like the opportunity has never arose: people have had crushes on me and I've had tons of chances. I just haven't been at a place with myself and my mental health where I'm ready to open myself up to people romantically or physically, and I'm okay with that. So right now, I'm simply uninterested. However, I know someday I will be and I'm excited for it. My problem lies in that I fear I'm missing out on the experience. All of my friends have lost their virginities and have boyfriends and girlfriends they hang out with and do cute stuff with. They cuddle at lunch and go on double dates and talk about how they're so in love and I'm just here trying to hold myself together. I'm worried that when I'm finally ready for a relationship, I'll be too awkward and inexperienced while everyone else is in their prime. They'll all have experience from high school of secretly sleeping over to their boyfriend's house and making out and all these teenage hijinx but I have nothing positive to look back on other than the achievement of keeping myself alive. I'm graduating next year and I can't help but wonder: am I really missing out on the best times of my life?
your doing just fine!! I dont knw you but iam very proud of how you stay and remain a pure young lady! Focus on school and stay out of trouble,, You are not missing nothing,, wait later on in life and it will be worth it, when its the right person!!
I just want to say that I'm on the same boat as you. I'm going to be 19 this fall and I've never been in romantically involved with anyone and as far as I know, no one has had a crush on me. I am very socially awkward and don't mingle a lot. I've had the same thoughts in my head too, for so long, but one thing I've come to know that I'm not really missing out on anything. Things would come to order when the time comes.
So until then, you just have to accept the way things are and try to be happy. 😁
No my dear you're not missing out on anything. True, your friends would have more experience than you but does it mean that they have the maturity to draw wisdom from those experiences? Wisdom needed to maintain a healthy relationship? The fact that you mentioned, 'the achievement of keeping myself alive' shows that you have a heighten sense of awareness where life is concerned than someone who probably dived in a relationship without learning how to appreciate themselves more.
Do not worry about being awkward. Showing physical affection has a much shorter learning curve compared to actually getting to know the person. The question to ask yourself,"How much is the other person willing to get to know me better despite my 'awkwardness'?
When you're graduating next year, ask yourself. With all the kissing, cuddling, double dates, doing cute stuffs and reciting endless lines of being in love, have they learnt about about the person? Have they learnt how to properly communicate in a relationship? What about their self image? Are they capable of establishing their own space? Have they learnt how to compromise for the other persons sake?
The act of keeping yourself alive means that you're learnt some valuable lessons that probably wouldn't be possible if you were in a relationship. You have nothing to worry about dear.
You?re not missing out darling. I was the exact same as you at 16. There are many people who are or have been in the same boat! You?re right to take care of yourself first, if that?s what you need. I guarantee that you are not missing out ? when you?re sixteen it might feel like you?re running out of time, but that simply is not true. You are so young, and you have so much time left to experience all of these things.
You especially shouldn?t worry about being too inexperienced for a relationship later on. When you meet the right person, they won?t mind that you?re initially less experienced, or they may be inexperienced themselves and you can learn together, in a much more mature way than your friends may be doing at the age of sixteen. And it really doesn?t take that long to learn all there is to know about being in a relationship ? a few months is more than enough to get the hang of things.
