Which is stronger ?

Met back in 2015or 2014 via an app called whisper. He was nice, kind, we used to joke around, & stay on the phone until the late night. In the beginning, told him I'm the type of female to stay committed with someone once sex is involved. Time went by, we got close which led to us having sex. After 4 months he started to act distant and then drop off the bomb that he didn't want anything to do with me. Since then a cycle began where we would talk, flirt, meet and break again. I admitted to him on several moments I had feelings for him, yet he never wanted to discuss it (thought he wasn't good at speaking about his emotions). Recently, we were talking about meeting up again until I stated we wait a little more before we try a certain sex position. He didn't like that and completely ended things while at the same time belittling & degrading me. I mentioned that I wished him luck with his next relationship this is where he began to lash out at me, stating not to call things a relationship, I was a liar and faked being kind throughout the years with him. All I wanted to do was work things out with him since our last break. He left me several messages same day of the break but I've been too nervous and debating if I should read them. Is it stronger for me to move forward without reading the messages or to respond and clarify any misunderstandings?