@Lostboymarco
My heart really goes out to you at the moment, because I understand things are not very easy for you.
You must try and find a successful way to communicate your feelings across to her, and I know that's scary, but there is nothing worse than feeling trapped in your own emotion and suffering in silence. Change is hard, and I'm not going to say it an easy ride, because it's not, but you can't stay as you are either, you cant make someone stay with you of it is wrong for them and ultimately wrong for you too.
Facing your fears and emotions is one of the hardest thing you will probably have to face, but by facing it, you are not avoiding, you are doing something, and to do something is better than doing nothing, and although it hurts in the interim, the outcome is so much better.
I wish you the very best of luck, and please feel free to contact me if you want to chat, I've recently been wearing similar shoes, and may be able to walk through this with you.
Take care
