How to talk about a breakup/relationship in therapy?
Recently I've been having trouble with anxiety and depression and am finally going to make an appointment to see a therapist. But I realized today that I'm not going to be able to avoid talking about this really complicated relationship that has caused me a lot of emotional turmoil (there are things that happen that give me flashbacks that often lead to me just crying inconsolably, etc.). I'm embarrassed by the amount of sadness and anxiety I allowed myself to go through for this relationship and don't want to try to explain to someone why I made the terrible decisions I did. Also, I don't want it to turn into me blaming my problems on my ex, something he did constantly about a previous girlfriend. Does anyone have any tips on how to bring this up with a therapist?
I think you're probably right about not being able to avoid talking about the relationship that caused you, and still causes you, so much emotional turmoil. A good therapist will involve you in the process so that you don't have to decide in advance what to bring up and how to explain it, and that should happen from your very first appointment.
If it doesn't happen, and you find that your relationship with your therapist is becoming an additional problem in your life, not a solution, then I suggest the thing to do is try a different therapist. It's common for people to try several therapists before finding one they can really work with comfortably.
@sunflower9412
@sunflower9412 When I started seeing my therapist, I alluded to a complicated relationship but didn't explain in depth. She gave me a choice of whether I wanted to talk about it or just say the necessary pieces to explain feelings I wanted to work on. I agree that any good therapist will give you options and allow you to disclose what you feel comfortable with.
@sunflower9412
I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through a rough time. Talking to a therapist should just flow. It should be someone you are comfortable with. If you aren't then you might have to try a few until you find the one that you can be open to
@sunflower9412
Therapists are supposed to make you feel comfortable opening up. And they've likely seen it all before. You're not alone. I know it's easier said than done. But don't be scared! They are there to help 💙💚💜