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Good communication

NoManIsAnIsland June 11th, 2016

I often wonder how many people would still be together if not for bad/ineffective communication. People underrate the power of communication in relationships, when in fact, if you're in a relationship, communication plays a vital role in regulating and keeping the relationship solid and steady. Not to mention, making the relationship enduring to obstacles and changes through time.

Any more thoughts about it?

11
June 11th, 2016

@NoManIsAnIsland

I can definitely relate to that. Communication is vital in a relationship, I've always had troubles in my relationships trying to get my partner to communicate. I guess it all depends on how much you want the relationship to work. The less desire or care for a relationship to work out, the less communication there seems to be. At least that's what I've experienced in failed relationships. Communication takes work and effort and sometimes, someone just doesn't care enough to make that effort.

I also think age and/or maturity is a big factor in whether someone is willing to communicate enough to keep a relationship afloat too.

5 replies
NoManIsAnIsland OP June 11th, 2016

@KindListening I agree with you. But I think it's also important to consider that some people are not expressive or usually inclined in communicating their feelings due to their personality. Some may be like this because of trust issues, and others, to just simply avoid saying things they'd regret (assuming they see themselves as ineffective communicators or simply careless with words). However, if two people really want to work things out, I strongly believe that apart from their emotional investments on each other, they too should bank on communication. Understanding the other person's reasons for not communicating or ineffectively doing so should also be considered, of course not that it should be tolerated, but rather, understood and addressed carefully and efficiently by both parties.

4 replies
June 11th, 2016

@NoManIsAnIsland

Personality can be a factor in lack of communication, that was something that I definitely went through with my ex (he pretty much blamed everything under the sun for his lack of communication. Including me). However, I think regardless of personality, trust issues, fear, abuse, etc..if you really want a relationship to work out, you'll do everything in your power to make sure your partner's needs are being met. Unfortunately my ex decided that his next partner deserved that. So I know that he knew that it was necessary and important and he was capable of doing so.

I guess some relationships aren't met to be sadly.

3 replies
NoManIsAnIsland OP June 11th, 2016

@KindListening I'm sorry you had to experience that. People can be like that sometimes, and when they do learn and do better, they often do it too late or do it for someone else. I guess you could look at it like some people do, you're relationship with him made him better.. just not for you.. Ugh. I'm sorry, that was horrible. Anyway, know that though there are some people like him, there are also other people waiting to be found. For a person like you who values and understands communication, anyone will be lucky to be with you :)

2 replies
June 11th, 2016

@NoManIsAnIsland

Thank you heart

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Zhekel June 11th, 2016

Hello. I've been having big problems with depression lately, sometimes I won't even missy of a day but getting up is to much effort to even eat... And I don't know to explain this to people who should know, like my roommates, who have done their best to deal with it, but can't understand. Not entirely. I've got no idea how to express to them what I feel, but they deserve to understand my situation. Any advice would be great.

1 reply
NoManIsAnIsland OP June 11th, 2016

@Zhekel First of all, I'm sorry you're experiencing this now. I'm really no good in giving advices, and I don't intend to give one. But I have a working knowledge in effective communication so I may as well use it o help. Communication is difficult whether interpersonal, group, or mass comm. However, having constant experience in all fields, there are three things I find consistent - organization, content, and execution. Collecting your thoughts and sentiments, and organizing it the best way you can, can help you express yourself better. Some people do this by bulleting the things they want to say or making short phrases and expounding it later on. Another thing crucial in effective communication is the content. You have to be very careful in wording your thoughts so as to avoid any misunderstanding and/or conflict. The more you give your words some thought, the more people are likely to understand you and empathize. The last one is very crucial. Often, people have misunderstandings not because of what they say, but because of how they say it. Remember that there are different ways in approaching others - depending on the situation and the people involved. When bound for intimate discourses with closed ones, we usually approach them with the care, respect, and patience typical for loved ones. I'm sorry I can't give you any specific way to approach your situation, but I hope this helps.

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Versatchy July 15th, 2016

@NoManIsAnIsland Communication goes a long way but so does open mindedness.