Divorces affect everyone
Sometimes I get members/speakers on here that are dealing with their parents' divorce or separation, and they often feel helpless and upset, and I never know what to say to them without offending or over stepping any boundaries. Also, many times their feelings are over looked because the parents are too focused on what's going on with themselves to realize that they are hurting the child too.Personally, my parents have gone through a terribly messy divorce (still are actually), and every situation is so different there is no single way to really talk about it. Do you guys have any tips on how to help people going through a parent's divorce?
That's a really tough question. I've read a study somewhere (but can't vouch for its accuracy) that parents' divorce is the second biggest trauma a child can go through (first being a death of a parent). As you said, every situation is different, so it's difficult to offer any targeted help. I'd say that empathy and listening is the way to go in this case. Reassuring them that this too shall pass and that their parents (hopefully) still love them. Also, I think it's important for every child to know that the divorce of their parents is not their fault.
I agree! It's so important that they don't blame themselves. I just never know what to say because they are almost always so absorbed in thinking that they are at fault or being depressed about it that nothing i say can get through to them. And at that point, listening isn't enough anymore because they want answers/advice. Thanks for this though, it's really helpful! :)
