My favourite quote from Funny Story

" I don't want you to look at me like I'm broken"

Many of us do this, we avoid telling people the worst parts of us, the anxiety we face over little things, how over sensitive we are, how we care way too much and cry way too much, our insecurities, how we are barely surviving because we don't want them to look at us and know how broken we are, because if they know they might not want to be with us.

I think this is what I'm doing too. I used to tell about my anxieties to my male friend but now I'm trying not to because I want him to be with me more and more, I don't want him to distance himself, I don't want him to think I'm some immature person he has to kinda babysit. I'm trying to be more courageous, I'm trying to make myself better and trying hard to become a high value women even though I'm barely surviving just so he would maybe want to be my friend forever, so that he would not be fed up of me, so that he would think of me as those girls who are confident and independent, so that he would think of me as a fun person, so that he would smile because of me, so that he would think of coming to me whenever he wants to feel happy, so that he would want to call me every other day, so that he would maybe love me and so that I don't feel like I don't deserve him because he is a better person than me and I'm too sensitive for this world.