Withered rose
The leaves have fallen like the tears from your eyes,
The rose has withered like the love you once had inside.
The stem is broken like the person within you,
Planted in barren soil to show the fruit of your ways.
With a callous heart, you pierce through my skin,
Undeniably, you represent the pain held within.
Yet, beneath the frost, where shadows softly creep,
Lies a promise of rebirth, though the wounds cut deep.
For even in the bleakest nights, when hope seems to fail,
The seeds of healing stir beneath the frost and hail.
For with time, new shoots will break through the hardened ground,
And from the darkest moments, strength and grace could be found.
@adaptableMaple1545 I love the way this poem mixes pain with hope – it’s got that real, raw feeling of heartbreak but then there’s that sense of renewal creeping in. The imagery of the leaves falling, the rose wilting, and the broken stem all paints such a vivid picture of emotional destruction, but then the idea of healing beneath the frost is so powerful. It’s like you’re saying that even when everything seems lost, there’s always the chance for something new to grow. The ending gives a sense of quiet resilience – that, in time, things can be better, even after the hardest moments. Really beautiful, heartfelt writing
@azurePond
Thank you so much for your kind words. I’m so glad the message came through for you, and I really love how you described the ending as a 'quiet resilience' because that’s what I was hoping to express. I don’t usually write poems with a hopeful ending, so this one was a bit of a change for me. I wanted it to be a reminder that even when everything around us feels dark, broken, or wilted and sometimes like you stuck in that place forever; there’s always the possibility of healing. Sometimes, all we need is to hold on to the hope that we will grow again, and that our time to flourish will come. Your insight really resonates with me, and I appreciate how deeply you connected with it.
@adaptableMaple1545
I loved the way you used simile to set the tone for the dual metaphors of nature and elements that carry through the whole piece; the two seemingly incompatible forces struggling against each other. It has a very wintry, melancholic feel and is interesting in one can interpret the narrator as speaking to different target audiences; it can be read as self referential, or maybe the narrator is taking aim at a former intimate, or even the callous world at large. I liked how you moved from more free verse to rhyming couplets after the first stanza; it felt like the first was almost an indictment (or a self criticism), but then moves on to a more distant tone, sounding ever more detached even as the words become more uplifting and hopeful. A very interesting piece indeed. Thank you for sharing it.