Controlling emotions
Hey everyone, good morning or good evening or whatever time it is. So does anyone get through the highs after going through really lows but then you feel kind of neutral where everything doesn't bother you but is that normal? I know I've been using this platform a lot lately and just been checking in a lot more. And I have been you know doing things to keep myself distracted and not really just distracted. But just keeping myself in a better mindset. I recently realized like I go through a lot of Lowe's and when I go through Lowe's I forget my days and things like that. So I've scheduled some therapy for myself because I know that I needed it and it's not getting any better. But is it normal to go through a lot of highs? And if you feel like it's coming back on like what do you do to you know control whatever is going on because I don't want to take it out on anybody or myself really. So if anybody has any opinions or any like things they do let me know.
@Divineluxx
Hey, there are a lot of different approaches to handling emotions. Some things you mentioned that make sense include distractions, checking in with yourself to see how things are going, and trying to keep a steady mindset. (Also sounds potentially helpful what you mentioned of going to a therapist as they'd probably be able to come up with additional ideas.)
One general scheme I find kind of helpful for making sense of emotions is that most strategies for dealing with them tend to fall into one of two categories:
1) Acceptance - if you're not able to control an emotion, then having a relationship or attitude toward emotions that reduces the feeling of struggle or fighting with emotions. Some mindfulness teachers talk about thoughts/feelings as being like clouds in a clear sky. They come, they stay for a little while, and then they go away. Self-compassion falls within this grouping as well; if you're hurting, then just being kind to yourself. If you can't control something, then the idea is to at least not make it worse than it already is.
2) Change - doing something that alters your feelings. For some ideas, would suggest looking at some of the "distress tolerance" posts linked in this thread. The idea behind those is, building a toolbox of things that immediately help in the present moment with difficult feelings. The TIPP skills in particular are pretty specific/practical things that can pretty quickly change one's emotional state.
https://www.7cups.com/forum/personalitydisorders/Resources_2667/DBTuesdayMasterpost_274756/
@Divineluxx
Hey there, I’m really glad you shared this. It sounds like you’ve been navigating a lot of emotional ups and downs, and it’s totally understandable to feel confused by the shifts from deep lows to neutral or even higher moments. Moving through all of that can be so disorienting, but please know you’re not alone in this.
It’s amazing that you’ve taken the step to schedule therapy. That’s a huge act of self-care, and it can make a real difference in understanding these emotional waves. When those lows hit and you start feeling detached or like days slip away, grounding techniques might help keep you anchored. Something as simple as feeling the texture of an object in your hands or focusing on your breath can help pull you back into the present.
When the highs come, having a steady routine can be a comfort. Journaling how you’re feeling each day, even just a quick note, can give you a bit of insight. If you notice the intensity rising, taking a break, whether it’s a walk, splashing cold water on your face, or doing a simple body scan, can help calm things down so you don’t end up feeling overwhelmed or acting in ways you don’t want to.
You’re doing something really powerful by wanting to understand and manage your emotions instead of letting them take control. I’m so proud of you for that. Keep listening to yourself and taking things one step at a time. We’re here for you, and you deserve to feel supported every bit of the way.
