The Pain of Being Borderline - A Personal Interpretation

How many of us have been there?

You're sitting in the doctor's office, the ER, the therapist's office, in the classroom... and you're trying to explain to whoever what hurts. Because something does hurt. There's a pain inside, difficult to define, to reach, and to heal.

This psychological, emotional, or spiritual wound that begins to fester the longer it's left exposed. You can't find it though. You just know that it's there, deep down in some dark recesses, nestled behind your pericardium. Or under your meninges. Perhaps floating in your stomach acid. Even, maybe, coursing through your vascular system, spreading like a poison, causing you to become septic.

It hurts. But the doctor, the ER nurse, the therapist, and the professor can't quite grasp the pain. They want something tangible. Something they can find, diagnose, and treat. It's not always so simple. It's not brain cancer. It's a cancer of the mind. A very important distinction.

It's all in your head.

If it's all in your head, though, then why does your chest feel heavy? Why do your lungs compress? Why does your heart flutter? Your hands shake? Your blood boil? Your brain scream?

It hurts. That's all you know.