EUPD - experiences, coping mechanisms and day to day living

Hi all, I thought I'd make an introduction thread where those with EUPD (Emotionally unstable personality disorder) or BPD (Borderline personality disorder) can share their experiences, from diagnosis to day to day coping mechanisms. I will share my experience below and you're welcome to add yours.

Background:

I was diagnosed with EUPD in 2017, 4 years a go, along with depression and anxiety. Since the age of 14, I remember suffering from suicidal thoughts and self harm, but as I grew older and left home, it developed into something more than that.

Pre-Diagnosis:

Before diagnosis I was going through instability in my emotions and life. I had left home at a young age and I would frequently change jobs, friendships, how I looked, how I felt, where I lived and so on, as a result my mental health was suffering. I found myself not only feeling severely depressed and anxious, but I also had erratic/irrational thoughts and intense feelings of fear or abandondment. This often would cause me act impulsively which would get me into difficult situations.

Post-Diagnosis:

After my diagnosis, I had a chance to understand myself and why I felt/acted in certain ways. It also gave me the opportunity to receive medication that I hadn't tried before. On the other hand, I was slightly uncomfortable, if not somewhat ashamed of the diagnosis, particularly after reading up on it via the Internet. You will notice after a quick Google search how BPD can be characterised as aggressive and intense and usually only focuses on the negative/extreme traits of the disorder. This leads me on to why I prefer using the term EUPD instead of BPD. I prefer the term EUPD as not only was it on my medical assessment, it also explains the condition more clearly than 'Borderline'. Borderline what? Borderline insane? Borderline depressed? I find 'Emotionally Unstable' is much more clear and efficient.

Coping mechanisms:

I find every single day, it is important to be mindful of any potential triggers that can cause feelings of instability. Being mindful of how I feel and respectfully communicating any issues I have before they become a problem is key to maintaining good, stable relationships. In addition I find it helpful to practice thanks and accountability; although I understand my personality disorder can cause me to act irractically, it is my responsibility to notice these triggers before they become heightened and appreciate those who support and love me.

Writing also helps me. Whether it's writing down how I feel, what I am grateful for, what I am pleased with. Or if it is creating a mind map of things that calm/stabilise me.

Amongst walking and meditation, I find routine key to continue my stability. Ultimately, the darker symptoms of EUPD is from motions of instability. Therefore, creating a routine and structure to my day to day life helps balance my emotions and put things into perspective.

Where I am now:

I'm currently 4 years married, I have been in the same job for 1 year and 3 months, which is the longest I've ever held down a job! I graduated in 2019 and every day I try to keep ontop of my mental wellbeing. Although I still struggle to create/maintain friendships, I make sure I surround myself with family who understand me.

I hope sharing my experience may help others. If you're even on this app, you are making progress to improve your mental wellbeing, which is great. I'm always being, mindful to keep ontop of my disorder as I know how quickly things can change. There is always better days ahead. Thanks for reading 😊