critique a song i wrote

i would love for some constructive criticism or advice on this song i wrote abt the greek god apollo :)

verse 1

pale skin porcelain

glowing glasslike sheen

hair glittering golden strings

pls lay ur eyes on me sunkissed king

lay ur twinkling aegean sea eyes on me

verse 2

ur sapphire liquid crystal eyes

dandelion hair

would it be just would it be fair

for me to earn just one stare

pre chorus

i lose myself in ur dazzling eyes sea eyes apollo

bathe me in ur solar glow

douse me in ur radiant rays

every inch of my skin kissed by ur sunlit days

chorus

please lay ur twinkling aegean sea eyes on me

see me somewhere whether earth or dream

glaring golden leave me sunstreamed

pray to god eros to bring u to me

please apollo lay ur twinkling aegean sea eyes on me

bridge

how much id gibe to be daphne

who turned herself into a laurel tree

to be marpessa id choose u undoubtedly

over idas any day id guarantee

id die to be Cassandra or coronis

whod reject the sun god for some mortal named ischyus

chrous

please lay ur twinkling aegean sea eyes on me

glaring golden leave me sunstreamed

see me somewhere whether earth or dream

pray to god eros to bring u to me

please apollo lay ur twinkling aegean sea eyes on me