What we've learned from our meditation practice

Hello everyone,

I've been slowly developing a consistent 'meditation practice' over the last six months or so. I don't have much depth or breadth of knowledge, but I'm taking a more intuitive approach with some guidance. I find the "Balance" meditation app very helpful, for instance.

I thought it might be useful to talk about what we've learned through meditation practice - what works for us, what hasn't, how it changes over time, how we learned to meditate, what 'ah-ha' moments we've had, the benefits we've seen, and maybe even some of the pitfalls.

I pose this question to all visitors so that we may learn from each other. First, start by saying how long you've been meditating and what 'school of thought' you might follow (if any). Then answer some or all of the topics posed above, as much as is relevant you. :)

Here are a few things I've been experiencing for anyone who is interested:

1- Meditation that focuses on emotional states or the body can bring up unresolved traumas and need to be handled with care. I wish I knew this before trying meditation, because it led to some very disagreeable experiences and put me off to mediation for a long time. In research I've done, this is not discussed very much by meditation advocates.

2- I've noticed if I try to 'let go' of all thoughts during a meditation session to quiet the mind, I become forgetful through the rest of the day. It seems to interrupt my ability to remember important things (such as where I placed my keys, or an appointment coming up). I've shifted my practice to 'holding' thoughts that require action, and only letting them go after a plan to deal with the subject is decided upon. Thoughts that are trivial or don't require action, or keep repeating, are the ones I train myself not to get caught up in. When I approach meditation this way, I become less forgetful.

3- Breath work is the most effective for me to improve well-being and calm when I am distracted, scattered, or stressed out.

4- Visualization exercises are most effective when I want to communicate with the 'unconscious'. If I'm struggling emotionally and don't know why, this helps me to pinpoint a cause.

5- Gratitude exercises work well when I'm unmotivated.

6- My attitude towards mindfulness has changed since I've started meditating regularly. I used to think mindfulness was only about 'staying present', such as not disassociating and paying attention to surroundings. However, I've come to a more refined understanding.

An 'ah-ha' moment came when I heard an interview with a doctor whom advocated trascendental meditation and claimed to have practiced under a 'world-renowned' teacher. She said she meditated 20 minutes and day and saw improvements to her focus and energy (she works 14 hour days with two jobs). Moments later, she talked about how she struggled with hydration. She said she never used to drink water and had three kidney stones. So, she resolved to drink more water - this meant she measured out how much water she was supposed to drink in a day and forced herself to drink it to make sure she stayed hydrated. This doctor mentioned that this was one of the hardest things she did in her attempts to improve her health.

I found this very striking - that someone whom meditates 20 minutes a day doesn't have enough awarness or is too busy to know when she is thirsty and forces herself to drink water. What good is meditating every day if you don't listen to what your body has to say, and must rely on external metrics to tend even the most basic needs? She didn't need more focus, she had so much of that that she could forget her own thirst! Often, it seems, what we want more of isn't actually what we need.

Mindfulness, as I understand it more now, is about being present enough to listen to what our body needs as well as our soul, and meditation can give us tools to listen more closely - not just during the practice, but at all times. I've come to a place now where it is getting easier to recognize what is helpful and what is hurtful, and not project into the future or the past to ignore bodily signals. I'm starting to trust my body's 'wisdom' in the present.

I believe it is not just me - that in western society we're taught to ignore when we're tired, ignore when we're thirsty, ignore when we're hungry, ignore when we're full, ignore when we are struggling emotionally, ignore when we are in pain, ignore our dreams. From work demands, to technology use, to diet, to how we set up our daily environments and engage (or not engage) our communities, we are taught to ignore our needs - often for the sake of 'normalcy' or productivity. Often we feel guilty for tending to ourselves, where self-care must be a trendy, commericalized production to win acceptance.

There are instances where we must put off our needs or external circumstances forces them to go unmet, but we can learn to be mindful when that is happening, and try our best to mitigate harm (for ourselves and others!). That is where focus and resilience becomes important, to me - not to ignore the impact of hardships, but to make our hardships purposeful.

So, that is what I've been learning from meditation so far and where I've found some meaning practicing it. Thanks for reading to the end. I look forward to hearing other experiences and perspectives!