Lesbian Relationships and abuse

Unfortunately, abuse is abuse, regardless of the gender of your partner. It sounds like she may be gaslighting you, which is another form of abuse where she tries to turn what she's done onto you as if it's your fault which it's not. She should never hit you or belittle you, let alone claim that you're the problem.

@ivoryCity7296

Hey girl!

Like the ShoebillStork said, abuse is abuse and it doesn't have much to do with your genders. It can occur between any two people no matter the relationship and no matter the gender or anything to that sort but more the treatment of one to the other. I hope maybe someone who has dealt with it may be able to provide you better insight though.

I don't think it's fair for her to say you're the problem. The other partner isn't the problem... there is a problem but it isn't a person it is something you both need to identify and take steps to fix to resolve it. I think that is toxic language... especially since you have committed to a relationship. It is a two-way street and I hope she does not continue to use such language if she knows how you feel because of her words and actions. Maybe something else is going on in her life that has made her put anger towards her so I hope she isn't just projecting it onto you.

I really hope a good conversation with her and communicating everything out from a place without anger or judgement will help.

Best of luck and feel free to message me :)

@ivoryCity7296 definitely emotional abusive, thank god i left

as someone who is definitely the problem in their relationships, i have definitely crossed the line into abuse without realizing it at the time. the crushing grip of retrospect really got me though. and it is genuinely very hard to lose people you have loved. there are a lot of dead ends in the neighborhood that is my romantic life

Hey, I am new here so i hope im posting in the right place

i met somone online last january and we started talking, playing games, everyhting was fun. i was suicidal by then and she helped be go through this. we fell in love and got toghether in august even tho she wanted to ask earlier
everything was fun, we had a month together, enjoyed our time, cried when we had to separate because we re long distance and promised we see eachother soon
i wanted to move there, 1700kms apart tohelp myself, earn money anf build our relationship, but i couldnt because of the virus
my home problems were still here affecting me, and also her bcos she was asking me what is goin on and i was telling her, she was my gf. in january she told me she cant be in a relationship anymore bcos she has to focus on getting her sh** back togheter so should i and that we should take some time for ourselves. by then she told me she is willing to give us a shot when it feels right to try again, but now she doesnt know what does she wants anymore
wasnt clear until yesterday if we really broke up but yea we did
we re friends, we still face time and talk, and say i love you as we still love eachother
but she doesnt know if she wants me anymore when things will get better
i am afraid to lose the only person i couldve see my future with, deep down i have the feeling that we will be together, or i want it that hard/ i dont really know but i feel quilty about it and idk what to do, i am in love with her and i dont wanna be over her bcos once im over im not coming bacl, and what if she might? but what if she will just dont care and just be with somone else?
i cant stop crying, cant motivate myself do to anything

im sorry to hear you're going through this, i hope you're safe!

Hey guys, it’s me again. We reconciled, and then last night I made her a dinner. She asked me to surprise her with dinner after she got off from work... well as it turns out... she didn’t like what I fixed for her. It hurt my feelings, and I felt like my *actions* weren’t appreciated.. even if she didn’t like the meal. Anyway, she got very defensive and told me “everything has to be about you” and that she hated me. This whole ordeal has spiraled into today. I was able to let it go and we put the pieces together long enough to make it into the parking lot of the grocery store... where she went in on me again. Telling me that I’m the problem. I’m the only problem. I stood my ground and said “I may be A problem, but I am most certainly not the only problem.” This enraged her and she hit me in the face. Again. She got out of the car and ran away.. I guess scared that I would call the cops. So now she wants *me* to move out and to divorce. We have only been married since October. It seems that I am the only one who took those vows seriously. I’m so over this, guys... it just hurts.