Gender Dysphoria
I just wonder how you can learn to live with the pain?
I have been experiencing life threatening levels of dysphoria for many years but cannot do anything tangible to improve my situation. I can’t afford the surgery I would need… I can’t do anything to affect my body image issues because of the dysphoria. How do you guys learn to live with the pain?
I appreciate you. Thank you so much for this beautiful response.
I have lately been experimenting with clothes and such and that has been the most incredible experience. There are certain things I wear and feel like I’m breathing for the first time. But I can’t wear them. Even in my free time, I live in an area that is not safe for me to express myself (and cannot afford to move either, so I feel extra stuck) so I am stuck as my pre transitioned/will probably never transition self.
It would help *so* much to be recognized for who I am, but revealing it would be dangerous and I would risk violence to myself and my kids.
@peachScarf5552 I don't experience this, but I experience other kinds of clinical dysphoria, and all I can tell you about that is that it's a really horrible feeling and you deserve to feel better. I wish you peace and safety.
Dressing the way you want, even if only when you're alone, may be helpful, as you note. I wonder whether you might also be able to dress in a slightly more neutral way when out in public, i.e., as an example, just jeans/t-shirts/sneakers as anyone might wear, so that you're not necessarily wearing clothing that feels especially wrong to you.
I'm hopeful that a future will come where we can all be more of ourselves, and I am also hopeful that you'll get to see that, too.
I will continue to make small changes that help, but I cannot hide the parts that give me the most dysphoria, sadly.
I have hope for us too. Things had gone in such an amazing direction and this… well, it’s a lot of steps back but we will push through, I know we will.
Wishing you the absolutely best as well.
Do you have any specific tips you use to minimize the emotional pain or your dysphoria? I understand it isn’t the same, but maybe there is something that could cross over.
@peachScarf5552 As hard as it is, accepting that this is the body you have (for now) can be a huge help. I've never had body dysphoria but without going into too many details I have a part of me I've wanted to get reduced for years and it's caused me a lot of issues, accepting that I'm kinda just stuck with them right now has helped me focus on other things. I know it's not exactly the same, but it might be your best bet in the long run. Remember that bodies are not always indicators of gender and that how you feel about yourself personally is the most important thing.
