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PL 101: Systems vs. Goals (Discussion 4)

GlenM June 29th, 2020

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Hello Leadership Crew!

Welcome to our 4th discussion in this first course. In todays discussion, we will be talking about systems vs. goals.

To start, please read this post here  and watch this video.

The basic argument here is that having a system is better than having a goal. A system is a way of behaving that helps you move towards accomplishing something. A goal is usually and end state that happens after you have accomplished something. I think eating healthy is a good example. A goal might be to lose 10 pounds. In this case, you feel kind of bad about yourself until you hit that goal; and then, once you hit it, you kind of lose the purpose because the goal has been reached. If you relapse and gain wait again, then you fall back into feeling bad about yourself again. Contrast this with a system of eating healthy. A system might include things like: having a big glass of water prior to each meal; eating a lot of fruits, vegetables, and nuts; not eating after 9pm; and/or doing some level of intermittent fasting. You wouldnt integrate all of these new healthy eating behaviors at once. Instead, youd gradually introduce one and then another and then another over whatever period of time makes sense. The system enables you to continuously get healthier and healthier. You will eventually reach the goal, but itll be the byproduct of eating healthy.

Another example might be education. I dont really care all that much about grades for my kids. I mostly want them to learn and enjoy learning. We talk about what they learn, we draw things, they make their own educational videos, they explain things to me in their own words etc. I want them to have a system of learning and refining their perspective on things. If they have this system, then having good grades will be a natural result of enjoying learning.

This also has implications for 7 Cups as well. We might have goals of having a certain amount of group support messages or 1:1 messages. Those are fine goals to have, but we mostly want to create a system of support where people care for one another and then the natural result is an increased number of messages. Or, zooming back, think about this leadership development program. We could have an arbitrary goal of training a certain number of new leaders to serve our community; or we can co-create a system - this leadership development program - that helps people become leaders. The natural consequence of the program will be a higher number of trained, competent, and strong leaders that can better support our community. Â

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed? What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

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SympatheticStrawberrySmoothie December 28th, 2020

After watching these videos, I realise that an important system that I want to set up in my life to succeed is gradually improving my overall mental state.

The three behaviours I will try to implement are waking up earlier than the people in my household to have some time for myself, avoiding getting my phone in the mornings and practicing meditation daily!

This activity has been really helpful to understand my priorities and ambitions, and will help me not only as a person with my own individual goals, but I believe that it can also help me grow and help others here on 7Cups!

ouiCherie December 29th, 2020

Hi @GlenM

Goals are good for planning your progress and systems are good for actually making progress. Noted.

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

Having priority scale and plan ahead

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1. Stop and take time before deciding to do anything.

2. Put plans on agenda as soon as it is decided and set the alarm prior to the due date/ time depending on the urgency and difficulty of the activity.

3. Check the agenda every evening for tomorrow's scheduled activities/ tasks.

⭐︎⭐︎⭐︎

Cheers!

iwishuwell December 31st, 2020

@GlenM

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

to go hard and never look back, and to be motivated and keep pushing myself to reach my goal

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1) patience

2) forgiving cause if I mess up , i need to forgive myself cause i have a hard time to do that

3) motivation

1 reply
specialSnow9454 January 12th, 2021

@iwishuwell pushing yourself feels tough, but always worth the effort

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mxmes January 2nd, 2021

@GlenM

A key system that I need to set up would be to be a better person. I don't want to better myself for someone else, but I want to do it for me. I often feel as though some things should and need to be changed, as it will benefit me greatly. I'm already making some progress as well!

1. I could try to be a bit more open-minded. I often stay closed up, which gets me into even more deeper things. It's also the other way around, if I'm too open-minded I tend to get hurt. I feel as though I can balance it out a bit, and try to make that new thing in my life.

2. I can try to be more friendly. When it's dealing with those outside of 7 cups, I often tend to put up a wall. It's like my defense system, I use it to keep myself from getting hurt. I feel like mabye I will have better luck breaking that wall down a little to see life on a different side.

3. Lastly, I could try to engage in more things. I'm the type of person who is a bit lazy and likes to stay in quiet-ish places. I used to go out a lot, but due to something that happened I have isolated myself from things. If I get out I think I would feel much more free than I do now. Being in one place all the time kinda breaks yourself down. So, I would like to build myself back up again.

I want to try to bring back my old self. Not my whole old self, but the way I did some things and the way I was partially happy living a good-ish life. I wish I would have experienced high school differently too. I feel as though I would also be a different person than I am right now. I'm doing better than I was before all thanks to 7 cups, I actually feel like I have a place.

1 reply
specialSnow9454 January 12th, 2021

@mxmes I love how you embrace change❤️

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specialSnow9454 January 12th, 2021

We need to be confident and self Loving

1. Fake it till you make it.

2. Revise a day before bed.

3. Exercise daily

1 reply
windSpirit February 23rd, 2021

@specialSnow9454 could you please tell me more about "fake it till you make it"? Does it mean to deny that it's done until it's really done?

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BellatheHappyHelper January 14th, 2021

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

A key system that i need in my life to succeed would be to create a to-do list of everything i need to do for that and add on to and check things off as i go, creating a timer for a specific amount of time to do each thing.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

- i need to be able to stick to what im doing, there isn't going to be any procrastination or saying ill do it later, do it right then and there

- i need to get it done first and then perfect later (no time to be a perfectionist when there's too much to do :p)

- start making my system a habit, like make timers for everything ahead of time or have pre-set timers for specific things.

everything im trying to say is probably making no sense at all lol

January 18th, 2021

@GlenM

~ The system I want to set in my life is to 1. Follow a structure 2. Become more self-loving, self-caring, and self-accepting.
~ The 3 things I can implement are: 1. Begin my day with a checklist 2. Practice self-affirmations every day 3. Journal to maintain consistency and keep a track of my progress.

SirenSymphony21 January 20th, 2021

@GlenM

I want to get less attached to people.

3 behaviours I would like to improve:

1) Get less dependable

2) improve my self-esteem

3) get less negative

IceCream4IceCream January 21st, 2021

@GlenM

1. What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

My health hasn't been great for a while so I haven't been able to exercise like I did in the past. Exercise really helped me with my energy, mood, and feeling good.

So a system to gradually get back to into it would be to:

1. Exercise 5/7 days for one week for 15min/day

2. Exercise 5/7 days for one week for 30 min/day

3. Exercise 5/7 days for one week for 45 min/day

4. Exercise 5/7 days for one week for 60 min a day and so forth.

I could change the increments based on how feasible it is in practice - I might need to start at 10 and increase by 10m/ week only.

2. What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1. Scheduling a set time daily and adding reminders to do it.

2. Wearing gym clothes when I sleep so that the first thing I do when I wake up is exercise

3. Working out with a friend to motivate myself

4. Tracking my weekly progress so that I can see how much I'm doing and built these behaviours into habits.

goldenFriend9335 January 24th, 2021

@GlenM

The system that I want to start in my life is to study more and eventually get better grades. 3 ways I can improve my system is having a dediscated time everyday to studying, start wiith the two minute rule but try for 30 minutes, work my way up to an hour. And, keep my studying space tidy!