Siblings...
***Trigger warning in 2nd paragraph***
Today, I talked to my mom and found out that my sister and her 3 children are moving cross country and moving in with my mom. My mom is in her early 80s. My sister is in her 50s and all the kids are adults. My mom is stressed, but so am I. My sister moving there means I will not be able to visit my mom. It means that I might not be able to talk to my mom as much as I normally do. I feel like the relationship with my mom will get much, much worse.
These aren't unfounded worries. My sister and I haven't spoken for about 15 years, because of some horrible stuff that she did to me and my kids. She put my daughter in a really harmful situation, just because of how my sister feels about me. She also told my mom that my experiences in life...this is where the trigger warning is...such as physical and sexual abuse, were all lies and my mom believed her.
Anyway, I am not sure how to feel or what to do. My mom has always told me that my sister is her favorite and that she will always love my sister more than me. Although this is painful, I don't want to have regrets when my mom dies and want to make sure that we have a relationship, even if it's not exactly the relationship I want.
@LovelyPlace4774
I just read your post and can feel the unconditional love for your mom in your words. It's hard to watch things like this happen with no way to influence the outcomes. While I hope your sister doesn't interfere and you're able to maintain a relationship with your mom, I hope you can give yourself some grace if things do get worse as you anticipate. If you're able to communicate with your mom right now, I encourage you to consider that. If phone contact is not possible, perhaps you could write to her instead. I wish you well as this situation unfolds.
@MidwesternCalmSeeker
Thank you. I really appreciate your response.
