A Space For The Unsaid (Personal Diary)
Uh hello if anyone is reading this! 😀
I have no idea why I'm even creating this thread but i just feel it will be nice to have a place to share some thoughts or even these images on the internet that i always keep saving for myself because i relate too much but cannot share it with anyone because yes haha
I'm okay with replies here so feel free to drop by anytime ❤️
Just please be kind and respectful if your replying to my posts.
@Optimisticempath It sounds like a great idea and it can also motivate people to talk about anything that may be going on in their heads. There are no stupid thoughts or questions and just sharing sometimes helps a lot! So, people shouldn't hesitate to share no matter how insignificant it may seem. Thank you for creating this thread!
The reply button keeps poofing on us 💀
Yes so true it is scary and yeah lol shut down or freeze reaction is so relatable 😮 thanks for the suggestion Soul I can try the letter thing yes 👀 I'll try it :")
Aw now because of them other Listeners won't b able to connect with you too? :(
I get the easy way D: it feels comfortable to avoid pointless confrontations tbh , I see :o but no it doesn't sound harsh considering you're only trying to set boundaries and protect your own sanity which is good ❤ hope they don't bother you again :(
Omggg really?! Yes we need that limit changed, what even was it for smh ... made no sense 💀
yes smol cute pup hehe 🥰 thanks xD that's an adorable smile
lately it just feels like days are passing lol like simply passing... somedays I don't even bother to see what day it is 🤡 all the same ... 🥴 and yet I am...
haha
How was your weekend? Hope your off to a great week ahead also 🤗
@mytwistedsoul
@Optimisticempath Hey you 😊 second attempt to post - ugh
I really do hope that you and your friend can work things out. The freezing makes it so hard to take that first step. You're brave and strong - I believe in you OptiBear ❤️
Yeah - no listeners can contact me now but it's ok. Not many did anyway and that's ok. I still have a couple of people who left me open invitations to reach out
Someone mentioned on that thread that they had been told it was changed and someone else said they weren't sure why they changed it to begin with. I tracked down the post where the reason behind it was explained. It didn't make much sense then and tbh - it still doesn't lol. Because from what I understand forums are like the simplest most basic function. But I really hope they'll at least bump it up to ten. I did notice there's still little glitches here and there and sometimes the pages still stutter or they don't go to the latest post when you click the tag 😕
Gosh that sounds like me lol. The days just pass - it could be a Monday or a Saturday - they're all pretty much the same anymore. Omg - yeah tired all the time lol. When you get up thinking about when you can go back to bed 😋
The weekend was busy. The weather is getting colder so there's plants to get in and wood to chop and stack
Thank you 😊 *Big hug* ❤️ I hope your week is going good too!
@mytwistedsoul
Aw the forums really be messy 👽
Thanks so much Soul, it means a lot to me ❤ I hope so too, I keep going to our old chats and there was so much love and warmth and connection it is all missing right now idk I feel I get isolated really quickly, and the emotional distance just makes it even harder to feel emotionally safe around someone again ... it just feels like going go square one lol *sigh*
I'm happy you've got some safe offers that you can take up when needed ❤ it is hard finding one ourselves lol so nice when someone kind offers it to us hehe --- support :')
I see haha and agree too, it doesn't make any sense and shouldn't be a limit in the first place but yeah atleast 10 would be more tolerable 😅 lmao ikr there are so many glitches , everytime I'm logged here I find a new one haha so hard to keep track of both the glitches and the changes ...😔
You described it perfectly 😂 *wakes up* "damn I can't wait to sleep again" what even is this life haha 💀 lolzzzzz the doggo is hilarious 🤣🤣🤣
We are already in for another weekend omg why tf is time flying so fast 😭😭😭
ooh sounds lots of work hehe but also necessary I imagine 😮 hope you get some rest too after all the manual work
Week's been ok ok... I'd celebrate the day I feel it was a good week or even a good day lol. An optibear can wish xD :') 😆
*bigger hugs back* 🤗🤗
How you today? Did you do anything nice for yourself recently? ❤
@Optimisticempath 
*hugs* ❤️ I really do understand this. I understand the fear behind taking that first step - the fear behind a possible confrontation and the fear behind explaining your feelings or trying to. It's really hard when you make a connection to someone and then suddenly that connection is gone. It's kind of like suddenly finding yourself lost. Then the bad thoughts come to visit and we isolate because we listen to closely to those thoughts and kind of get convinced that we're bad and suck as people. And I totally get the not feeling emotionally safe. And the isolating - keep to yourself so you don't hurt anyone and you don't get hurt either. Or even thinking you deserve to be alone? Maybe square one is better than no square at all? I'm sorry - I hope that doesn't sound invalidating. I don't mean for it to. I support you no matter what - you have my word on that
You are a good person Opti - don't let those bad thoughts fool you into thinking otherwise. I think there's alot that goes into friendships and sometimes there are missteps and misunderstandings. That whole being human thing. Could your friend maybe have the same concerns and fears? Like maybe you're both sitting and waiting for each other to make that first move - worried and scared of what the other's response might be? Could you maybe text a hey? Or even a heart? No pressure of course - because I do understand those fears ❤️
Gosh - those good days are so far and few aren't they? And if you're like me those good days probably seem alittle sus when they do come along
Things here are - Idk. There's been a few good moments but an equal amount of bad moments too. But tomorrow is another day and it will be what it is and we just have to go with the flow - lol - welcome to my confusing Ted talk. Thank you very much for asking. Tbh - I haven't been doing much nice stuff for myself - not like I should probably but it's a work in progress - baby steps
How are you? Have you been gentle with yourself and your thoughts? I can understand if you need time for you - even time alone can be a form of self care but I hope you don't isolate yourself too much because the longer we do it - the more comfortable it gets and the harder it is to break
Sending you strength and love ❤️ ❤️
@mytwistedsoul
Soulll missed you 🤗
can always use hugs hehe thankyou 🥺 *hugs back* ❤
Aw thanks for understanding... yeah all these are terrible thoughts and feelings to have that just make it feel like I'm drowning in them :( and you're ok don't worry haha, i appreciate your kind thoughts and support so much <3 (I've been feeling like I'm maybe overthinking or fussing too much about something "trivial" which is in turn making me feel so much worse, so I really appreciate that you listen to me so patiently and support me 🥺 thankyou)
yes so true there's a lot of misunderstandings and part of being human thing 😅
We talked a bit today and it was better than couple of weeks but idk still very much feels like walking on eggshells, and being emotionally guarded :')
Thanks for your kind words.
hehe happy to be part of your ted talk and it is vv ok to feel confused or be unable to make more sense with words, words definitely fail us so often :') not our fault lmao, I like the notion of going with flow too, there's only as much we can do .... sometimes just letting all be feels better, I understand ❤ sorry about the bad moments tho, I'm here for you ok? You can always share with me or even just sit with me or share hugs 🤗
you admitting that you need to put work in doing nice things for yourself is very brave 🥰 baby steps yes yes, you deserve all the nice things for you *cheers for youu*
I'm trying to manage and be ok, have been down with fever too so another bummer lol but just a viral so not to worry <3 Thanks for that honest reminder , you're right isolation feels more comfortable and gets harder to break :( I'm trying to be gentle and not get too swallowed in all the thoughts, yeah... your presence is very helpful you know ❤ I am vvv grateful to you *feels loved and stronger* 🥺🥰❤
Sending lots of love back and big huggies too 🤗🤗
How was this week for you?
@Optimisticempath *hugs* missed you too OptiBear ❤️ 😊
Aww Opti this is great news! I'm so glad you two talked! 😊 It will probably take alittle time for things to feel more comfortable and to lose the eggshell feeling - because the silence and distance that happened is probably still fresh in your mind. That emotional guard doesn't just drop the whole way down - it lowers little by little until we feel emotionally safe with that person again. I don't think it's trivial but I do understand how we can feel worse thinking it is. Like we figure other people would just let it go and get over it? I figure if it bothers you it's important - it doesn't matter how big or small it might seem ❤️
Oh no! I'm sorry to hear you're not feeling well. Make sure you get lots of rest *sends healing vibes* ❤️
Its ok to not be ok too - ok? I mean - I'd love if things were perfect for you but I know the reality of it is that we're all here because we're going through things and dealing with our own battles. You can bring anything you want or need to. I hope you know that - I respect if you don't want replies and I give you my word I won't judge you or your thoughts - no matter what they are. Or I'll sit with you - quietly or not so quietly. I guess - I just want you to know you don't have to manage alone - there's people here *me included* that care about you and want good things for you - no pressure though either ok? ❤️
Rest - drink lots of juice - eat soups. I hope you feel better soon
*big hugs and love to you and vibes - lots of healing vibes* ❤️ ❤️
It was a good weekend 😊 Thank you for asking. A trip to a Renaissance Faire and a wolf sanctuary. It was so cool! I think I could live at the Renaissance Faire lol 😁
@mytwistedsoul
*hugs tight* Thank you for being so nice to me always 🥺❤🥰
Yes all of it is still there, and idk how to really move past it but I hope it gets better in time , thanks a lot for making me feel heard and less alone always ❤
IT is probably the season change viral comes and goes lol, I'm doing better ... your healing vibes worked yay 🤗
This paragraph is so much full of love and compassion Soul, thankyou it feels like a warm hug 🥺 really means a lot to me ty ty ty ty ty so much *huggles tight* I really like having you around and hearing your kind words 🤗 thanks for being so understanding and caring always 💕
Im feeling much better physically hihi 😊
Omg it been a week D: sorry :( I'm really happy you had a good weekend, if I recall you like wolves or feel you resonate with them? It must have been nice visiting the sanctuary ❤ and the fair too wow, what is it about and what all did you do? (If you comfy sharing ofcourse 😅)
been a week already oops hope this one was nice too? How you doing? *sending lots of hugs and love back*
@Optimisticempath Hey you 😊 you deserve so much niceness. I see you reach out to so many people here - to help them feel seen and heard. You deserve to be seen and heard too *big hugs* ❤️
I'm glad you're feeling better. It's no fun being sick and it takes so much energy out of us
No worries about time ok? Life happens. There's work and school and just every day things and before you know it the days pass. Please Opti - there's nothing to be sorry for ok?
Oh gosh - yeah I do like wolves. They're just amazing animals. They're loyal and protective and so family oriented
Omgosh - the faire is so amazing! Its like taking a couple steps back in time. There's the king and queen and the rest of the Royal court that wonder around the grounds. There's jousting and sword fights. A falconer that did demonstrations with some birds of prey. Those are as cool as the wolves. 😊 There's a swordsmith who makes swords from scratch. Those are great too and I do collect those lol. There's little comedy shows and story tellers. Then there's palm readers and other mystical stuff. The whole place is set up like a village complete with small buildings that look the part of medieval days. Plus people go in costume and you can buy just about anything related to that. So that's cool to see too because some people really get into it. There's archery and music. The drums are just amazing. Oh! And a human chess board lol! They have themed weekends too - for just about everything but it only runs for a few months - August through the end of October. But man it is soooo cool! 😁
Tbh - I've been sick too. Just can't seem to get rid of it but thank you for asking ❤️
sending you loads of love and lots of hugs ❤️ ❤
*I really really wish they'd get things straightened out here in the forums. Its so hard getting gifs and even just copy and paste 😫*
I'm reading some of the answers or spaces to share unsaid words and it is inspiring. I'm thinking alot of my task to do. It's eembarassing to share that I struggle this time. I recognize my bad habit. But I am grateful for everything today!
@Optimisticempath
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@brightIcicle2822 @Optimisticempath 
Just wanted to drop off a hug and let you know you're in someone's thoughts
Be gentle with yourself ❤️
Why does everything have to be so hard :( it just feels neverending and on loop
cant even explain what exactly and why because I don't think I know either maybe I don't even want to know? Possibly :( I just really want to hide and disappear.... sorry to everyone I disappoint... I am getting real great at it lmao :')
Tired.... scared.... anxious. ... overwhelmed.... chaosss
@Optimisticempath *sits with OptiBear* I don't think anyone is disappointed with you ❤️ Concerned of course but you don't need to explain anything
I'm sending you the biggest of hugs right now ❤️
@mytwistedsoul 🥺🥺 soul *sits with you* it just that ... people irl are.... it's reflected in their words ... actions.. expression ... I dont blame them because they probably right but idk .... it's so hurtful and a lot of things idk how to explain 😣
thankyou for being here and being your kind self , I really appreciate you so much 💕💕💕 *hugs tightly *
@Optimisticempath *big hugs* ❤️ those words and actions are maybe a bigger reflection of who they are as people? People get upset and frustrated when things don't go the way they want or maybe they say and do certain things to try and manipulate the situation. I know it doesn't ease your hurt - I wish it did because you have such a big beautiful heart Opti and people should treat you gently and with kindness ❤️
@mytwistedsoul
I think we don't get two separate tags in same post :( it'll be nice if we did.. I didn't see your previous tag first 😮
Aww it's so sweet of you to say , I'll be honest ... I try 🥺 Ik it feels horrible being alone so I'd just want others to not feel like this, thanks a lot for noticing and reminding me I deserve niceness too , can use this reminder so often 😅 I see you being so kind and supportive to everyone too soul, I mean that's how we met here also and omygosh I am utterly grateful for you and your big- heart ❤ you deserve all nice and kind and happy and safe and supportive things also 🤗 *big huggie bac*
Yes lmao so not fun, doing way better now but I'm sorry you've fallen sick too :( same reminder to you hehe please take care, have lots of fluids, soup and warm stuff and take good rest and be vvvvv nice to yourself , I hope you get better really soon ❤ me here wichu
and you're right life happens 😅 and then keeps happening smh, thanks for being so understanding always <3 your always in my thoughts and you're welcome here anytime 🤗
Wow that's nice how you see wolves as loyal, protective and family oriented. I mostly see them as scary lmao but I've heard also , wolves are known for being all that you mentioned, and they very caring and loving for their packs! Sometimes I feel humans have a lot to learn from animals 😅
Really happy to hear about the fair , it truly sounds spectacular and a once in a lifetime kind of experience 😮 so much to explore and do around is fun and idk I can imagine myself next to the mystical stuff corner lol, I think it is quite spooky but also fascinating haha, maybe get my palm read for fun xD do you believe in this stuff? 😁 I personally haven't tried anything of the sort to know if I believe or not, but either way it seems interesting to me :D
super glad you had lots of fun yay so intriguing to hear you collect swords 😄 Did you wear a costume too and did you buy anything from the fair? I bet there's a lot of tempting stuff there lol! the music makes everything so much better 🥳 I can sense how excited you are and I'm happy to see you so happy☺
Aw thankchu *me feel loved and hugged* 🥰🥰 sending so much love and safe huggies to you and also lots of healing beams , hope the sickness shoos far away from you and you get better vv soon 🥺❤
Omg YES the forums are a whole lot of mystery and stress lmao, elevators and forums in cups have something in common "they are both always up to something 🤭" 😆😆😆 *giggles*
@Optimisticempath Hey you ❤️ I've missed you. You're right we don't get multiple tags. I wish we did too. And I think one tag might cancel out other tags too but I'm not sure
You're right - it does feel horrible being alone. I get so used to sometimes though that I forget how to socialize I guess. Or maybe I just listen to closely to that voice that says I deserve to be alone
This being sick really rocked my world. I'm glad you're feeling better now and I'm hoping I'm finally on my way back to a full recovery
Gosh you're so right. People have so much they could learn from animals. Animals aren't cruel just for the sake of being cruel
Oh gosh you would love the faire! There's just so much to see and do. And they change things on the weekends - they have a pirate weekend and witches and wizards. Different music groups. Just some of the shops they have. There are some amazing books and runestones and candles. I've never had my palm read but I wouldn't mind trying it. Just to see what it says. I'm not really sure if I believe in the mystical stuff but I'm open to it 😊
No costume this time but I wouldn't mind dressing up if or when I go again. Be kind of cool to pretend to be someone other than me - lol. I did get two dragons and two small gargoyles lol. Allmost bought a sword but holy cow - expensive 😬
Aww thank you so much for the hugs - love and healing beams - very very appreciated
Sending much love and hugs back to you dear OptiBear❤️
I hope you're doing ok and being gentle with yourself ❤️❤️
OMG! 😂 that's so funny! And so so true! Lmao! They are allways up to something! 😋😁😂
@mytwistedsoul
@mytwistedsoul
Ahhhhh idk Soul that just made me feel really nice, thankyou for keeping me in your thoughts 😔 miss you more ❤
Yeah that makes sense alsoo tags and notifications seem messed up even more now 💀
aw I know how terrible it can get when we listen too much to that little meanie voice :( and about forgetting to socialise I can relate too haha almost feels like we get used to being alone then people just feel weird and uncomfortable @_@
you deserve to have nice and caring and loving people around yourself tho, because you yourself are super nice , caring, sweet, kind, loving and supportive 💕
what got you sick Soul? 😔 how are you managing with everything?
I hope you get well vv soon , sickness bad :( *sending more powerful healing beams with extra love* ☺ they work better hehehe
please take lots of rest and care and healthy foods to get better really soon
Yes so true, humans being cruel is just ughh -_-
Omg it sounds a lot of fun really 🥺 just hearing all about it sounds very dreamy and nice, I'd love to experience it some time too haha! Wee for being open to it lol not necessary to believe but yea they be fun xD
lmao I had to look up gargoyles xD they scary :o and dragons too 😮 interesting haha! I can imagine they charge more for stuff here considering it's all fancy, antique, aesthetic-y kind? xD glad you got atleast some kind of souvenir tho hehe and wow a costume would be cool , I sooooo get what you mean by sometime not being yourself , I'd want that too sometime honestly hahaha :') I've never been to costume- anything I think 😮 now I'm thinking what I'd choose if I did lol , what about you? 😁 any costume ideas?
Uhm tbh lately I just don't know how i am doing really, my "ok" is again quite blurry hehe , guess nothing too bad so yeah okay 😅 trying to be gentle when I remember to be gentle 🙈 sometimes it's so hard to uh just remember it 🥺 thankchu for reminding me always ❤❤❤ you are the beary best 🤗
Haha I'm glad you found it funny and true too 🤣😆
@Optimisticempath Getting a tag from you is like a spot of sunshine to my day. I hope that doesn't sound too cheesy ❤️
That voice can be so convincing sometimes can't it? 😞 It likes to mimic things we've heard before. Maybe that's why it's so hard to argue against. But gosh you're so right - after spending too much time alone people do feel weird and uncomfortable
You deserve good people in your life too Opti because you are such an amazing person. You give encouragement and support to so many people here - I really hope that you have people in real life who give you back as much love and kindness as I see you give here. You really are a very special person and I am so glad to know you ❤️ ❤️
I guess a bunch of things contributed to getting sick. I have a bad habit of burning the candle at both ends and I don't rest the way I should. It catches up to me and makes me rest. I let myself get too stressed over things I have no control over but things have mostly slowed down with the cold weather. *big hugs* Thank you so much for the powerful healing beams! I can feel their magic working . ❤️ 😊
Oh yeah they definitely charge more for things there because of the aesthetics of the whole place but some of it is genuine craftsmanship too. Some of the costumes they sell are handmade one of a kind. They have a fairies and fantasy weekend with pixies. Maybe you could be a magical pixie OptiBear with wings? 😊 ❤️
It's ok to not know. And I know how quickly things can change and how things get blurry. Just be you Opti - noone can ask for anything more than that. I care about you and support you on the good days and the bad days too and sometimes we can all use some gentle reminders - I'm allways happy to remind you *hugs* ❤️