Other ways to change topics in support rooms?
Hey Guys :)
As I've been doing a lot of modding with our lovely members, the ones that make our family whole, I would like to bring to the attention of self-harm.
Self-Harm isdefined as the intentional, direct injuring of body tissue most often done without suicidal intentions.
I've noticed while in the chatroomthat self-harm is a triggering topic for many, and changing the topic is okay! However, I want to make sure that ALL mods might know how to better handle it, change the topic, how to better handle it, and maybe some better resources to have!
For Example: Please imagine:
This is your first time logging on to 7cups, and the first time going into the support room. You're feeling triggered and want some support around your self-harm, and so you go in. However, you're new, and you don't know all the rules to all of this fancy chatroom, or the people or even the mods. As mods, we encourage you to talk about what it is that's bothering you, and when you mention self-harm, it triggers someone else.
STOP.
Okay, being someone who deals with self-harm on a daily basis of trying to recover, and knowing how scary urges can feel, I feel like we need a better way to move the conversation along. As mods we are told that no suicide (given) and to let members what's going on until someone say they're triggered. The issue that I've been seeing in some of the reactions I see, or the PM's I get is the lack of transition time. I am wondering if we can come up as mods with better ways to go about topic changes with ALL things (sorry, I just know self-harm best, hence my example) because it makes those who talked about it, feel worse that they talked about it in the first place.
Does anyone else have
*Sorry, my laptop went bad on me :(
I meant to say does anyone else have ideas on how to help ease the topic change so members don't feel bad, not just "because it may be triggering to others" because that can still be hurtful, and I am seeing it makes them feel worse as well. There may not be another way, just wanted to check in! Sorry for bad typo, laptop went bad!
@Heather
@Jake
Hey @Mikayla1000 - this is a great initiative, well done. Personally, I tend to run with something like: ' Thank you so much for coming here and seeking support (x) - it was very brave of you to do so, and it's been lovely to hear from you. Maybe it would now be better for you to seek out a 1 on 1 connection with a listener, as they can give you the support you deserve.
Thanks for making this post, Mikayla!
When this happens (or anything that you need to change the topic) you can go two routes after explaining why we need to move on:
1. A happy, no-stress transition
2. A 'feelings' transition
To make a transition to something happy I would use something "silly" as a conversation starter. You can ask questions like:
- What are some of your favorite things to do on a rainy day?
- Do you have any pets? What kind? What are their names?
- Do you like to read? What books?
To continue on a more supportive track you could use something like these:
- Inone worddescribe how you are feeling right now. (Start with how you are feeling so people feel comfortable sharing)
- On a scale of 1(the worst day of your life) - 10(great day), how are you feeling? (Again, you start) You could then ask one person at a time of those who shared why they are feeling that number and then move on to the next person. This will take some major practice because it is hard to make everyone focus, as you know.
- Describe how you are feeling right now in a color. Same as above with asking someone why and starting first.
Hope this gives you some ideas! I hope to hear other's ideas as well :)