Hurt and lonely, anyone here?
It don’t feel too good, I just lost someone close to me, and not in the way one would expect; for pretty much my entire life I lived with my sister, sure we argued and what not but we were still close for an unbelievably long time period. However over time my sister got spoiled and didn’t receive enough discipline. On top of this she ended up entwined in the horrors of the internet and the wrong people at school. The result was a hidden monster lying beneath, made out of ego centrism, hatred, greed, and pride. This monster that used to be my sister lied about my family, accusing all of us of abuse before ending up in a mental hospital last year for two weeks before returning home. Over time there were some conflicts, but things died down, Or so I thought at first. My sister was never the same after that; she became self centered, paranoid of touching anything dirty, and acted very rude and impolite towards my family. When my mom asked her to put on a ponytail she would freak out or ignore. She looked at everyone with a glare like she wanted me to get out of her face. She also looked through my phone after saying she wouldn’t, pulling more dirt on me after finding traces of an old addiction. Just a few days ago however things finally escalated, and I think for good. For context, the day before the whole family went to a graduation, we bought toys, pizza, ice cream, we played video games etc. The very next day out of the blue my parents and I found out to our horror that my sister had run away with her friends to attempt to live with some strangers and to lie about our family so that we could get in trouble. Luckily the police caught her and she was brought to a psych ward where she resides now. I also found out she ranted about how my family supposedly hates LGBT (for the record, we don’t hate anyone, no matter how much we disagree with others values). It hurts me immensely to find out that someone who I loved and spent so much time talking and playing with secretly hated us to the core this entire time. As a result I’m left with an empty hole where my little sis was. I have my loving parents whom I’m grateful for, but it wouldn’t hurt to find someone else on here too. I especially hope to meet a brother/sister in Christ, but I would be happy to meet anyone nonetheless. In short, I lost someone who’s still alive
Losing someone close to you, especially in such a painful and unexpected way, can be incredibly difficult to process. It sounds like you're dealing with a lot of emotions right now, from hurt and betrayal to sadness and confusion. Remember that it's not your fault what happened, and you can't control your sister's actions or choices.
@Vaporeon431 hi I'm lola ❤ what you just wrote was very sad, I'm so sorry she did that to you all. But it was her doing, so there's no shame or blame on you or your parents. It's just a very sad situation😥 all our brains work very differently, that's why you can never truly know anyone, unfortunately. I'm glad you reached out here, remember everyone here at cups is like one big family, so never suffer silently, I'm here for you, we are all here for you ❤ gives you a giant tiny hug ❤❤squeezes you tightly
@Tinywhisper11 Tysm you’re very sweet! I’m glad to know I’m not alone
@Vaporeon431 hugs you tightly ❤
@Vaporeon431
I’m sorry to hear that someone close to you, your own family member, did such a horrible thing to you. And I’m sorry that it made you hurt and feel lonely. But please know that you’re not alone. As you mentioned, you still have your parents. And you have anyone on here who’s willing to help you change how you’re feeling, myself included. And your sister is still alive. I’m hoping she’ll overcome her problems and return to you and you two can resume the close relationship you previously had.
@akunknown I’m afraid she went all looney and won’t return. What I need to do right now is try to avoid thinking about and cope with my loneliness and depression, which is easier said than done. Nevertheless I greatly appreciate your reply I can’t stress this enough!
@Vaporeon431
I’m sorry to hear that she won’t return.
It won’t be easy and won’t happen overnight but depression can be overcome. If you wanna overcome it, it’ll take commitment from you to work on it till it happens. Is there anyone you can talk with to help you with that? Because living with depression is not the way to live. You’ve been through enough already. You deserve better. So I encourage you to please give yourself better than you’ve gotten so far.
As for loneliness, same thing that goes for overcoming depression goes for that too.
The most important thing is that you’re happy and love yourself and your life. If you’re happy, great. If not, keep doing whatever it takes to get there. You can do it!