grief
i recenly just lost somebody really close to me on 10/6/2022 it has been 30 days without my nana
how does one deal with grief?
that is a question i keep asking my self
for me i really hate showing my emotions to my family i honstly hate my emotions
but this hits me really hard i never really got to have a good conversation with her becuase spanish was her only laungaage but i was learning spanish so i could talk to her but then she had to have heart serurgery and i waited at the hostptail as long as i can but before she went in sergury the last time i heard her voice was when she was crying saying she did not want to go to sugery
everytime somebody in my family passes or somebody that i know i go to say goodbye but when it comes to my turn to say goodbye i can never bring my self to say good bye
my family is hurting still so hard she was so close to us i loved her so much
why was she taken from us too soon?
her birthday was 10/28/2022 she would have been 65 years old
i loved her so much
*these are things i would say to her right now if she was here*
*i love you so much nana i am going to miss you so much i wish if i could i would have taken you pain away from you i wish we talked more i wish you told us more stories i wish you were still here i love you and miss you you will always be in my heart i know you will always be with me*
when i went to say goodbye and i saw her with all the tubes in her i could deal with it it was so hard and that image keeps on poping up in my head
usally i would spend the hoildays with her but not anymore
i wish i had more time with you
i wish you were still here but i know you are free and without pain
i love you so so much nana
rest in peace 10/6/2022