What to be friends?
@Whyme3112
Hey, this probably seems strange 😅
but I saw your messages in the group chat but it was an hour later so I wasn’t sure if you were still on.
It seems like you and I might have some stuff in common and I was wondering if you wanted to be friends?
No worries if you would rather not! 😄
@inventiveKitten4821
Oh hey..
Yeah.. I'd like that.. let's be friends.. you'll probably be the first one (friend) here for me..
Sorry about the late reply.. I usually don't expect anyone to read my messages.. although I kinda do..
Thanks for reaching out to me..
Honestly seeing this kinda made me happy..
I'm sorry for asking this but
What did I even message in the group chat that day tho?
@whyme3122
I’m so glad you responded! You are going to be my first friend on here as well
i don’t remember entirely but I pretty sure it was about how you felt lonely and wanted someone to talk to.
How is your day so far?
@inventiveKitten4821
Hey I'm glad to hear that
Honestly, these days.. I just feel lost.. I have no idea what I'm doing
And I've been alone on my own for the past few months.. even tho I sit with few people in uni during classes.. I just never really have lunch with them.. cuz they'd leave by the time I pack my stuff and don't care if I'm there or not.. I tried going behind people just barely putting efforts cuz it just made me feel like a dog going behind people like I'm begging them to bring me along.. so yeah.. I've been having lunch on my own..
What about you? How was your day?
@inventiveKitten4821
Idk.. I hope so..
Oh that's alright..
Wait, you crochet? That's cool.. you can make anything you'd like.. honestly, I tried crochet and made a small turtle and a marshmallow like cat which I turned into a keychain.. but I didn't do anything after that.. is amigurumi the same as crochet?
What were you crocheting tho?
@whyme3112
I bet those turned out so cute!
Yes amigurumi is the same as crocheting.
I was attempting to make a mushroom for my mom for Christmas but it wasn’t turning out how I wanted so I had to scrap it. I’m going to see if I can find a pattern for it though.
did you enjoy crocheting?
@inventiveKitten4821
Hehe yeah.. they did turn out cute..
Ohh ok..
Woah.. that's really cool..
Yeah.. I did enjoy but I spend a lot of time doing it..
I have a lot of incomplete work due since the past month.. all my classmates have already done everything. I'm so scared rn. Mostly tensed.. at one point, I just want myself to just fail drastically and hit rock bottom. For instance, we were asked to choose a professional elective last week and I was feeling so lazy and exhausted, like I didn't wanna do anything at all.. I just felt like I procrastinated and now the things just keep getting piled up and I feel more stuck and I don't think I'll ever be able to do anything. Sorry.. I'm just ranting out..
@inventiveKitten4821
I'm studying Computer Science and Engineering.. it feels like such a competitive world out there.. I feel like I've done nothing helpful for my resume.. I've heard a lot of people don't get jobs or pass interviews and now I'm honestly scared of unemployment..
@inventiveKitten4821
Hmm what do you do for work, if u don't mind me asking?
@whyme3112
i don’t mind, I work in a retail country store. So we sell a lot of animal feed and garden stuff.
I really enjoy working in the garden and clothing departments.
@whyme3112
that is a competitive area but I’m sure you will do great!
unemployment is scary…
do you still have time to do stuff for your resume?
@inventiveKitten4821
Honestly, I'm wasting my time
I just feel so lazy, I just wanna lie in bed and do nothing..
But even tho I wanna, I just don't feel motivated enough or I'm just really lazy I don't wanna stress about something which feels out of reach or something new that feels scary to try..
@inventiveKitten4821
I'm sorry I don't reply consistently
I feel so bad about it
My school friend, who's in a long distance relationship used to tell me how her partner would not reply for days. She ended up picking up that habit and due to that I might've picked it up too..
But I feel so bad yet egoistic? Idk.. and now we aren't that close..
She just calls me when she's free but when I try she's usually busy. And yesterday, she did call me after so long, I wanted to take the call but then I knew she'd probably tell me about how successful her life's been going so far, cuz the last time I called she told she's focusing on herself than her partner. But I just wasn't in the mood to listen to that when my life feels like it's falling apart. Moreover.. I think I'm pushing everyone away even more.
@whyme3112
Don’t worry about the inconsistent replies, no matter how long it has been it’s always nice to see that you’ve responded.
i also do not mind the ranting. It often times helps to rant about stuff. I personally do it too
lack of motivation is a really tough thing to deal with. And I’m so sorry that you are struggling with it. Is there something small that you could do in 5 minutes that would help your resume?
im sorry to hear about your friend. I totally get that feeling. I used to be best friends with this girl and now I feel like I have been left behind by her.
that’s why I am so glad that you agreed to be friends because now I feel like there is someone who I can relate to and I’m not as alone anymore.
@inventiveKitten4821
Thanks for understanding..
Honestly, sometimes I wish I could just do nothing..
But idk.. I don't know what I can do for 5 mins everyday to help me for my resume.. I just really feel lazy and yeah.. lack motivation..
I'm sorry to hear about your best friend too.
@inventiveKitten4821
It didn't really go so well
I missed my deadlines. I've been procrastinating a lot.
But I'm hoping my professors would cut me some slack tomorrow. I still have a lot of incomplete work. All piling up.. ah..
Thanks for checking in.
How have you been lately?
@Whyme3112
And thanks.. I hope this week at uni will be good..
Hope you're well..
@whyme3112
I’m sorry to hear it didn’t go good.
I hope your professors will give you some slack. Are they aware of what you have been going through?
Im doing ok now but this weekend was rough. I went on a trip with some friends and basically got ignored completely.
I hope this week does go better for you!! 🤍
@inventiveKitten4821
I don't think they know.. they might tell me about how other students have got that done and why I wasn't able to.. but I was at fault cuz I wasted my time. Procrastinating and being lazy. Idk.. I just really hope they'll consider whatever I've done so far..
Oh.. a trip huh.. I understand being left out.. atleast you got invited.. but then again.. may feel lonely either way.. no one invites me.. well, idk.. probably cuz I don't talk in a way that's understandable or appropriate to the situation or maybe I stay quiet... I really don't know.. I'm just assuming, which I know is bad. Sorry about that. It sucks to be ignored. Ok.. um.. I'm really sorry.. sometimes I just wonder how do two people who need help, help each other.. I'm really sorry.. sometimes I fear, what if I'm not what you thought I was.. is it really bad? Sorry.. my head hurts.. I'll try to reply after I'm in my right mind. I think I say a lot of hurtful things when I'm not.. I'm really sorry
And yeah..
Hope this week goes well for you too ✨
@whyme3112
it is not just you at fault. There is something causing your lack of motivation. You aren’t lazy, you are struggling with your mental health.
it is a trip that we do every year so I was not necessarily invited personally. It’s kind of an open invitation type thing.
I about the how do two people who need help, help each other. I always thought about it that we have somebody who will listen and who understands us. Then we don’t quite feel so lonely. That’s for me at least, I’m not sure how you feel.
all I knew about you is that you were someone to talk to, someone who noticed that I exist. And I hope I can be that person for you.
@inventiveKitten4821
You're right..
Oh.. open invitation.. yeah.. I guess I've got that once..
Hm so it won't just be one person ranting and the other listening? Cuz I feel like both need someone to listen and I'm not sure.. I wouldn't want the other to feel unheard.. although I agree with you saying that they can understand each other.. hmm
And.. thanks.. you're someone like that for me too.. cuz I saw a lot of people on here make friends and talk and acknowledge each other and it just felt.. well.. idk.. I'm just glad you noticed and wanted to be my friend and yeah.. here.. even though I don't reply soon.
@inventiveKitten4821
Just another rant,
My bestfriend I mentioned texted after so long, telling she's not doing well with her partner and she talked like we talked just yesterday
Then when I did tell her something, she just said she got confused with what her new friends told her which sounded similar to what I said.
She told me how she's enjoying her life. It just sucks to pretend like she didn't hurt me. Along with my life totally messed up here. She didn't really ask about it. Idk.. sometimes I feel like totally cutting ties with her but.. I'm not a bad person to do that so I pretended that it didn't hurt. It's not like she contacts me often anyways..
But hiding how I feel is really making my chest feel burdened.. I really wanna cry but I hold back.. idk what I'm doing anymore..
How was your week tho?
@whyme3112
It would not make you a bad person to cut ties with her. You do not have to keep pretending with someone who just repeatedly hurts you.
it would be better if you explained what was going on. If she still doesn’t change then I would cut ties.
it isn’t healthy to hide how you feel. It’s just going to make things worse for you.
I am really sorry about your friend though, that is a hard situation to be in.
my week was better other than the fact I have been sick. Work had some hard moments but overall better than least week.
how have your classes been?
@inventiveKitten4821
Hmm you do have a point. It does make things worse.. hiding how you feel..
Oh.. I see. That's good to know. Hope you get well soon. ❤️
