Need advice :)) fight with my friends
My “friends” in school ignore me and kind of hate me because someone of my “friends” said something that I said and did something bad I didnt even do. And nobody believes me when I try to explain everything because I did literally nothing wrong. And I dont know what to do because my friends are actually really important to me and we’ve been trough so much together. And I have no other friends then them. Do you have some advice? Because I cant lose them.
@isi124
Hello! I’m sorry that you are having a fight with your friends. You are not alone. I think the first thing I would suggest is communicating with them and trying to talk it out, which it sounds like you already did. If that doesn’t work then perhaps give the situation some time to cool off and possibly with time things will get better. Unfortunately there is only so much you can do if your friends aren’t willing to listen and solve the conflict with you. There is no easy answer. Just know that your feelings are valid and that you are not alone, there are people here for you. Best of luck and take care!
Sounds like high school where people will just do what’s “popular” and believe what’s popular; even if what’s popular is bullying people and doing the wrong thing. 🫤 In the end if they believe lies about you and don’t give you the chance to explain yourself, it’s because they would rather believe the lies of the other “friend” rather than believing your TRUTH. People who do this are not your true friends.There will be lots of people who do not support you, who are not loyal to you, who look for opportunities to create drama and betray you simply because that makes them more popular, and makes their lives more interesting because they are bored. If you surround yourself with these people, you will be constantly miserable, and feel very lonely, you’ll always feel attacked.
As we grow older our friendship circles tend to shrink. Part of it is because we start to realize that it’s not a popularity contest.. that having more friends doesn’t mean more happiness unless those friends are loyal and supportive of our growth and happiness. And we realize once all the constant drama is over, that we would rather spend our time investing in people that value our friendship.
Also, if they treat you badly but you are the one that keeps coming back seeking validation from them (because you “need” them), this actually just lowers your value in their eyes. And if you surrender to that need, and decide that it matters how they judge you (especially if they seem intent on judging you completely wrong) then you will always feel helpless and powerless, and be controlled by whatever other people think.
Choose people who choose you! Anything less is not friendship. Know your own worth, and hold to your own truth. Don’t let others dictate the person you become with their lies. You can always make more/better friends, but not if you keep chasing the ones who turn away from you.
CatsInTheCradle