Am I The A-Hole?

So basically, I had this little group of me and three other people which I'll name Rylee, Kirk, and Lorenzo, (Not their real names) and we've become more distant. 

About a year back, I knew that Rylee had a crush on Lorenzo because she told me. But just a couple weeks ago, she finally told Lorenzo she likes him. He ended up being a bit weirded out and now he doesn't hang out with us much which really hurt me because Lorenzo had been my closest friend for two years which is the longest I've ever kept a friendship.

So now Lorenzo barely talks to me and I genuinely miss him because he was my best friend but now he Dislikes being around me, Rylee, and Kirk.

Second of all, when the school year started, me and Rylee really grew close because of our similar mental health problems. Self-harm, (Which I have been clean for about 6 months now 🎉) and just general family issues, but I don't really talk about it anymore with her because when she talks about it, it genuinely annoys me. Like I get that people need to vent, be she just keeps talking about it over and over again and it's starting to frustrate me.

I also feel like a lot of it is my fault because I somewhat push her away. It's strange because I've been having these sort of mood swings recently. Whether it be I'm happy one day and depressed/irritable the other, or just in the span of a few hours. I'm not sure if is Bipolar Disorder or whatever. (I hate saying that because it feels like I'm self diagnosing)

Anyways, have a good day/evening/night ♥