Caregivers - doing your best, guilt and anxiety
hello guys,
I'm alone taking care of my mother alone from about 4-5 months since I'm only child.
How do you deal with this feeling of doing your best to make things work as best as possible (organize medical examinations, medicine, financial things and so on) but sometimes despite the efforts you make some things doesn't change or improve?
it seems more obstacles arise along the way, sometimes I feel I'm not doing enough or I get this anxiety to protect my mother from suffering additional problems but you can't prevent certain things from happening.
it's kinda, you can't have time to calm down or stop thinking about things to do..and feel guilty if you try to take time for yourself, your projects etc..
anyone experienced those feelings? how did you mange them, or what helped you in those situations?
Thank you
@GentleBeing797 HI, I might not be qualified to answer your thread but since others have responded to me about my issue, I noticed yours here, and I wanted to pay it back and be kind.
Due to my mother's situation, I was reading something about surgeries, and I read that even people who work as caregivers are encouraged to have a normal life, like not ignoring friendships and having a social life outside of what you do in order to avoid depression, and because it is part of self-care and encouraged.
I think you are doing a good job and doing what you can. I am sorry that you are alone in this but it would not hurt to seek some support from others if possible and some external relief as you are doing here also by writing us.
I think it's normal to encounter difficulties and frustration at times, I thikn you are doing a great job. Do not give up and don't be too hard on yourself. I hope you will not feel bad taking some time to yourself
Wising you and of course your mother the best, and also the best possible outcome while.
Thank you very much, yes maybe it's about not being too hard with my self.
I'm keeping my friendships in this moment and fortunately they are very supportive with me in my free time.
Maybe I suffer being alone taking decisions with my mother, I wish I had someone in my family near with me in this moment to give me some advice.. but as you said "don't give up" 😄
Yep, I'm currently looking to some kind of external support from associations near my city (still searching something) and I just found this 7 Cup community which I think it's very beneficial, bot for sharing and reading about other people's experiences 🙏
so sorry for the typos in my message
please ignore
@GentleBeing797 thankyou so much for being your mums carer ❤❤ to me you are a hero, so Thank you ❤ I need 24 hour care cause of physical disabilities, I live in a carehome. And I'm so thankful for all the care I recieve. Your not gonna do everything right, not Will you prevent everything from happening. It's a lot of pressure and a lot of stress, I'm sorry about that. Is there a restbite care where your mum can go to give you a break during certain days or some offer a few weeks during the year where you can have a self care holiday. Might be something worth looking into.❤ God bless you and thankyou ❤❤ your mum loves you and appreciates everything you do, even if she can't say it herself. Thankyou for being a hero ❤
Thank you! ♥️ You are a lovely person and I wish you all the best 🙏🙆
@GentleBeing797 you too ❤❤ gives you a giant tiny hug ❤❤
