family fighting
for the last couple of months, my parents’s relationship has been going down hill badly. my dad has been an awful person, not supportive, causing drama everyday, he says he wants to be there for us but doesn’t put in any effort. it causes me anxiety being home cause i never know what mood he may be in. it just sucks a lot seeing their relationship fall apart and my dad doing nothing at all to improve or be there for my mom. i don’t wanna make anything worse my talking about how i feel, but i have grown so angry at him. my mom has been doing so much and he still treats her with no respect. he accepts her to do so much, work, caregive for him and take care of us, while he does nothing. i feel like we are having to please him so he doesn’t get upset. i feel awful for my mom cause she doesn’t deserve to be treated like this. and i hate how they are still together because she feels bad for him.
@smolstrawberries Hey, I am so sorry to hear about what you have been experiencing these past couple of months. For a child to see his parent's relationship not working out can be very difficult and often results in not letting out what you feel to others only because you don't want to overburden the current situation. How have you been coping with this?
I can understand you because I have faced a similar situation in past where it feels that the job of the mother is taken for granted so much, where she is not appreciated enough and given very less respect or nothing at all. On the other hand, the father acts narcissistic and is unable to deal with his own issues always in an unpredictable mood. What changes would you want to see? and do you have any way of implementing these changes?
But let me tell you one thing, keeping your feelings bottled inside towards your father and not confronting him would only make it worse for your mental well being. Resentment is bad. I cannot tell you what to do but I want to tell you that feeling helpless and encouraging your father's behaviour by tending to his needs, and moods will only give him more power over you and your mom. Talking about boundaries, How you feel about all this is really important. Mutual love and respect are the keys to the success of any relationship and if it's lacking then there may be troubles. So, What would be your next step?
Feel free to get in touch with me any time you want to talk about this. Just a text away. and I do hope you overcome this situation soon enough. Much power to you :)
