Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Mom issues and no dad.

helpfulWater4093 January 16th, 2021

A while back I finally met my biological father after 25 years of not knowing him while I was in a relationship with my, now, ex fiance. Eveything changed where I found myself leaving domestic violence and my dad later went out of the picture. Both men in my life are now gone. Then i decided to move back to my mom's house to get back on my feet after years of vile abuse from my ex. My mom, however, I find toxic. She's emotionally draining and probably looking for validation. I find her repulsive but I wanted the stability I've never had in my life. Any advice?? I tried "not playing her game" type of attitude, but it puts me in a more higher position and then i feel like a caretaker rather than a daughter. What should I do?? After domestice violence i had to let go of some of my friends because of the connection they had with my ex. I'm pretty much riding solo at this point in my life. Just looking for mental clarity. Thanks.

3
juliak1968 January 16th, 2021

@helpfulWater4093

Your not alone my freind! I wish you to start healing and possibly get a trauma therapist. I have one now and she is changing my life and outlooks. Seek wisdom, it lives in the shadows of trauma and the more we learn, the better we become at finding peace and purpose in our lives. If you ever want to chat tag me.smiley

Blessings, Day

2 replies
helpfulWater4093 OP January 17th, 2021

@juliak1968

Thank you for reaching out to me, which is really rare for people to do in my situation. I have to carry a personality that protects me in a way because of the damaged self esteem i had to endure. I found an "outlet" of exercising and mainly increasing my well-being and leaving the dating in the backseat. I went through a situation i can't understand in my early 20s. It went to the point where he was trying to ignite me on fire. I have a hard time opening myself towards men because of the trauma i went through. I'm not sure how to tag people on here, I'm brand new to this site.

1 reply
juliak1968 January 17th, 2021

@helpfulWater4093

Welcome to 7cups!! Tagging is adding @ and the name you want to see the message. Mine would be @juliak1968, I'm very sorry you have endured the traumas, we should never allow our past to steal our future. Keep getting better by self care and being kind getting to really know andvlove yourself. Once you reach a point you can learn to be your own best freind and then you can advocate for yourself and gain self esteem confidence, and self awarenesss :-) Im just struggling along myself so i hope to start getting it right.

Blessings!!, Day

load more
load more