returned more screwed than ever

good evening I am back and have relapsed and don't know how to get back on track!!!!! i lost a bunch of weight and am now at the lowest i've ever been outside of childhood and i cant stop. im doing my best to recover again (forced into it by partner, im really not ready for it so i expect failure again) but i can already tell im slowly prepping for an extremely low intake day and the funniest part is, i dont think I can stop.