New to this
New to the app. New to accepting that I have an eating disorder. It’s an everyday struggle and either way I end the day feeling like a failure. Why must I obsess over everything I put in my body? Why do I still feel/ look fat in my head? Maybe just a bit longer and then I’ll be happy. Ugh… why am I like this?
@Srrg2000
I have an eating disorder and I can totally relate. *Hugs*
Bad ED day. I appreciate you!
Wanna talk about it? <3
I obsess over everything I put in my body. I’m so scared I’m going to gain weight. This is the smallest I’ve been in my adult life and gaining my weight back feels like a complete failure. I restrict and then binge and then purge. I don’t eat for fear of being fat. It leads me to becoming starving and I allow myself to eat but can’t stop. I either eat enough my body reacts by puking or feel guilty and make myself sick. The meals I do keep down are because I distract myself immediately after or go to sleep. It’s usually one meal a day. Even that seems excessive. But then when I’m starving and eat everything in sight I feel worse because I set myself up for failure. I’m tired of everyday being a constant struggle. I’m tired of every meal being a struggle. It’s not supposed to be this way. I just hate it and feel like whatever the outcome, I’m going to be disappointed.
I’m so sorry… :(
I tend to binge eat without purging. It seems to be a stress coping mechanism.
@Srrg2000
Not sure if I have an eating disorder or not. But, because of my diabetes diagnosis I've been stressing out about what I can and cannot eat. So a lot of times I don't eat. My kids are worried I will develop and eating disorder.
I’m sorry. That sounds terrible but I completely understand what that does to a body. I would suggest a meal plan with your doctor. It may not be a full blown eating disorder yet but it definitely sounds like something’s there. Apparently food is just supposed to fuel your body. That’s it. Not make you stress out or anything mentally besides supply your brain with energy to function. The restricting will force your body to search out a source of energy from something other than the food. This can result in very serious damage to your body that you may not even notice until it’s too late. Then food makes you sick. It’s a weird cycle and I urge anybody who sees any signs of an ED to seek help. They snowball quickly and are hard to recover from.
@Srrg2000 I can relate to you I too feel fat in my head at times I really understand you. I too go through this every day. I would focus on other things, things that make you happy I know difficult to do. I tend to count calories which makes me worse and weigh in every day which also makes it worse. I also exercise every day. I spoke to a really good listener on here and they said to try a bit at a time and talk to yourself as though you are your friend. Do the things you find easiest to do first like eat something small a bit at a time. I hope you feel better within yourself soon.
Thank you! I’m sorry you can relate but it makes me feel better to know I’m not alone in these feelings. I hope things become easier to manage on your end as well. We’re gonna make it through this! 🤞
@Srrg2000 Thank you for your support. You are right we will get through this.
society has basically caused it i think for me