Constantly worried about my image

Hey guys I don't know who will read this or who replies but I honestly just need a place to speak about this, I greatly appreciate some advice

A bit about me m i'm a 21 year old female 5.7 ft tall, and weigh 64kgs

So here's the story

I've been going to the gym for well over a year now training 5 days a week an hour and a half each session I work full time 5 days 8 hours in childcare, and basically I hate my body, I've found myself over the past few months progressively more and more hating my body, looking at myself picking apart every little insecurity I have, I have avarage bust, avarage waist but no hips, big thighs and really prominent hip dips, I absolutely despise and am disgusted by my hip dips I wish everyday I didn't have them and I had nice hips, my stomach sticks out and I try so so hard to make it not do that because I hate it, I look at Instagram models who've achieved the slim thick look in weeks and I've been trying for a year it brings me to tears everytime I see myself I try to enjoy sweet foods and treats but I cant, everytime I do I have mental breakdowns about my body and how it's gonna look after eating them, I buy so so many clothes I spendtoo much money on clothing to try to feel like I'm worth it

Please help me :(