Blood disorders

To start I dont know if this is considered a disability, but it's enough to have me fearing for my life. Thrombocytopenia is when your body does not have enough platelets which assist in helping the blood clot or stop bleeding when you are bleeding. Earlier this year I was told that it was what i had. Of course with this diagnosis came testing for other autoimmune diseases. And let me tell you, the waiting period for these results was longest and most scared I've been. Thankfully, results were good but I have my last follow up of the year next week and I am terrified that I'll get bad news. Since the beginning I knew that a bone marrow biopsy was a possible procedure and I'm afraid of getting done. I am scared that I'll need to get it done of I get bad news. I'm scared that I'll need to get my spleen removed if I get bad news. I've been trying to stick to healthy food options to boost my platelet count but man it's hard and I've been slacking. And being scared is something I'm not good at admitting so my response is too push everyone away because if I get bad news I don't expect anyone to stick around so I'd rather push them away than have them leave. It's all very messed up but that's how I'm coping.