Getting over my loneliness
Hey... does anyone know how can i get over my loneliness? I need real advice, not all this "You will find someone one day" stuff. No, I will not. I am way too ugly and too short to be attractive for anyone :( I am feeling worse and worse everyday, as all of my friends find partners and some are starting their own families already.
I have no chances of ever being with anyone. I need help with learning how can I stop dreaming about being loved.
Well,I can't give any advice but i feel nothing should be thought about. Just live in the now,do not think about any future.
Well as they say, you're not ugly you're just not your type. You seem to be very negative towards yourself, and thats unfair to you because you have value as a person beyond just what you look like. I know it can hurt when it seems like everyone around you has a significant other when you don't, but that doesn't necessarily mean where you are in life is 'wrong.' Because yeah, things like that aren't something you can just plan out.
I think maybe you could start doing self love exercises, like listing your good points, compiling nice things people have said to you and keeping a daily log of things that youre proud of yourself for doing, no matter how minor. I know that might seem a bit irrelevant to loneliness, but I think feelings of loneliness are exacerbated by general insecurity and unhappiness. You could be surrounded by hordes of loving friends and still feel lonely because you don't believe in the positive words they're saying, or believe that their friendship is real, or you could have one friend you see very rarely and still be happy in life. It really depends, loneliness is an emotion not a reflection of reality. Not to say that feeling lonely is somehow invalid, it's definitely sucky, but the lucky thing is emotions can be changed!
Not to say you have to be passive about forming relationships, put yourself out there via dating apps or local events! You can only meet someone by actually meeting em. Good luck!
Also, if you're feeling lonely you could start investing more time into the relationships you do have. Friends may not be romantic partners, but they are a valuable support network and important to have. Maybe you could confide in a trusted friend or get closer to another friend who's also single? Surrounding yourself with people is the best way to meet more people, even if socialising can be tough.
In conclusion, you don't need to 'accept' that you'll be lonely forever. Finding a romantic partner may be something you want, but it isn't the be all end all of relationships, and I promise there's plenty of people who do care about you, and those kinds of relationships are just as worthy. Appreciating relationships you do have is often healthier than clinging to the idea of a different relationship, especially if you think that that fantasy relationship is unattainable. It'll make you feel better in the long run.
Hang in there, I hope things look up for you!
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