struggling
So...I'm having a really difficult time right now. I've been dealing with major depression issues due to medical problems and an uncle that died unexpectedly. I've had some suicidal tthoughts on and off. No plan, just in a I don't want to deal with this anymore. I still function, work, pay the bills etc. I see a psychologist for counseling and a psychiatrist for med management. I cancelled my appt this week with my psychologist and told her I want to take a break. Every time I go in for a session, all I do is cry. I get so overwhelmed and don't know how to manage it. Needless to say, I now have an appt mon. She wasn't overly thrilled on me taking a break. I get her concerns, but I'm really having a hard time. I'm tirer of crying.
It saddens me how badly you are suffering. Sometimes therapy is like having a mirror held up to you so you can see yourself. It's not easy nor is it pleasant. At some point, probably not right now, it's not bad to reassess your goals and the type of therapy and relationship you have. Inmy opinion, from the way you described how you are feeling, your therapist was correct-- this is not the best time to take a break. Of course, from this short description, I couldn't say if this is 'right' for you. I've had a few different therapists over the years. Each was quite different, but brought me further along.
I hope you can find some peace.
