first suicidal thoughts of my life...
I just wanted to share that I've been depressed since maybe december, and severity has gone off and on. Recently it's gotten really bad. I'm not the person that would ever kill themself, it would make me feel even shittier about myself to know i hurt other people with my death. But for the first time, I thought about it. Sincerely. I drove home from work late at night and on the drive saw a big telephone pole and saw myself speeding into it, picturing the scene. It scared me, but didn't surprise me. It's just the first time thoughts like that have been in my mind. Before I've always thought that it could get better. Now i feel so, stagnant. Just sharing this and wondered if there were others
@AllieJo2020 I'm so sorry to hear that you did think that, and the first time thinking these kinds of things can be really scary, alarming, and disheartening. I'm glad to hear you didn't go through with it and in general aren't the kind of person who would go through with it. Sometimes thoughts come unbidden and even when we don't want them to or didn't ask them to. You're definitely not alone in thinking of suicide despite never thinking you would be the kind to think it. *hugs* Hopefully you never get to the point that you would go through with it, and know we're all here for you! It might seem stagnant right now, but try not to lose all hope? It can get better, although it might take a long time. I believe in you though, you can make it through!
@AllieJo2020
It takes courage to share how you feel, when you have thoughts like that.
@AllieJo2020
Thankyou for sharing your story with us.
@AllieJo2020
Feel free to talk more about it with me or any other fellow listeners :)