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One day depression

User Profile: miillktea
miillktea May 3rd, 2022

The title might be a bit weird, but let me explain.

I think most of us who struggle with depressive episodes have had to deal with those days in one way or another before, so I was wondering if anyone had tips on how to cope with them?


Whenever I come out of a big (or small) depressive episode I start to pick up with life slowly again and try to move on. Thankfully my episodes don't last as long anymore as they used to, which shows me that most of my coping mechanisms and therapy assignments are working, but they still happen.

Then, when life starts back up and I start having more and more days where I feel okay again, there are those days in between where suddenly everything feels dull again and you feel helpless and wonder how you're supposed to live like this for the rest of your life, always having bursts of sadness and depression in between. And usually I KNOW that it's just one day. It might also be two or three days, but a lot of times I go to bed in the evening and am back to feeling okay by morning.

But those days where you suddenly feel depressed are worse with how much healing you get (in my experience). You kind of sit there like "I was happy and having fun yesterday, why am I back in this sad place again" and the next moment you fear that this might not be just another day but that your depression is back fully and you'll have to wake up again feeling sad.

Which, like I said, you in theory know is not true since the time span from depressive episode to depressive episode starts growing and growing with effort spend in healing, but depression still makes you think it could be true.

So on these little days of depression, when you're so easy to get triggered, when you are so scared that everything might come back right when you felt happiness come back into your life again, what can you do to cope?


Because honestly I don't know how to deal with these days. I spend them mostly staring at the clock, hoping that the evening comes and the morning will bring back the okay feelings that I fought so hard for to have.

But that makes me feel worse, since I'm just letting time pass by or don't do anything to make myself feel better or prevent another depressive relapse.


2
User Profile: MoonMomm
MoonMomm May 3rd, 2022

I totally understand how you feel! I’m glad you do get more good days than bad. I’m not there yet and still have way more bad than good. I call my good days unicorn days and usually get only 2 or 3 a month.

1 reply
User Profile: miillktea
miillktea OP May 4th, 2022

@MoonMomm

I'm sorry that you're experiencing more bad days than good. But I'm glad you added the little "yet" in the "Not there yet" part, because I'm sure your situation will get better as well!

For me it also took a long while (this is my 4th therapist) to finally find the right ways to handle my illness and while my depression has backed up a bit my anxiety has become worse. Although I think that's thanks to corona since I'm mostly not used to a lot of the things that stress me out anymore, so the anxiety is bigger.

I hope you'll get more and more unicorn days soon!

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