New (venting…a lot)
I guess i’m js gonna rant bc that’s what i kinda got the app for
I’ve been pretty depressed lately tbh, and i’ve been very isolated for a long time. I also haven’t been talking to anyone socially because no one really seems like they want to talk to me. I struggle with severe anxiety so I don’t go out a lot and I don’t hangout with anyone. I’ve been really bored so for the past 2 weeks i’ve just been sitting with my thoughts and I can’t stop thinking about negative things and the past.
Since I don’t have that much friends, I have bad attachment issues and whenever i get to attached i tend to dissociate for a couple weeks. About two years ago I met someone and we were friends for about 7 months and then we started dating. we dated for 8 months and then broke up. it’s now been 8 months after we have broken and i literally still can’t stop thinking about her. We became friends and started dating at a really vulnerable time for me, and i became really attached. She eventually started to stop talking to me and then ghosted me. That ruined me really bad and ever since then i’ve felt so much worse than before which i didn’t even think was possible. Even now i still think ab her and how i miss the old her which i can’t get back.
Im honestly just trying to get through stuff right now. I feel like i’ve been depressed for 4 years and it’s just been getting worse. Some weeks are better but then It just gets worse again. I’m trying to find things that keep me busy, but they can only keep me busy for so long. I am home schooled so I have a lot of extra time on my hands which doesn’t help my boredness or anxiety. I’ve also been feeling really angry and can get easily mad at people. I have zero patience at all and when someone is talking to me I feel like i don’t even have the energy to listen to the rest of the sentence.
Anyways just wondering if anyone relates to anything, feel free to reply or share anything if you want, thanks for reading :).
@ixsjxstmxk It sounds like you are at a really bad position in life, and I'm sorry for you. Why don't you try interacting with the people around you first? Usually people don't talk to strangers or aquaintances, so you have to make the first move. It also sounds like you really need to focus on yourself. Every person is different and you can always keep trying.
Thanks so much for sharing with us. You can come here to vent any time that you want without being judged. For some people that is daily because it helps to process how the day has gone. If you want, just add to this thread and I will try to respond once a day.
You have gone through a lot of loss and it takes some time to find your footing again. It is great that you have some distractions. It might be good to pick up some more. Do you go outside to walk at all? Or do you read books? Listen to music? Do art? All of those can improve the depression and anxiety.@ixsjxstmxk
I do all of those usually everyday, but i’m working on trying to get a drum set for a new hobby but I don’t have enough money yet.
Today was actually pretty good since i kept busy making resin art and seen some of my family. I also woke up really early which helped, and I went to my TKD class. Not a lot happened but it wasn’t that bad of a day and i kinda enjoyed it :) which isn’t common lol.
Any good day is a victory. I think that the hardest part of the journey is accepting the good days. Your brain naturally tells you that they won't last or that they don't matter. But they do. That is how you are healing.
The activities sound great. What kind of resin art do you do?@ixsjxstmxk
How have things been lately?@ixsjxstmxk
I’m in the same position as you. I’m struggling a lot. Mentally, physically and emotionally. I’ve been at my new job for two months now and I don’t feel like I belong. I been single for a while hoping to find someone, but afraid I never will. It’s hard I know. But just keep going. Your ex seems like a terrible person for ghosting you like that. You should never do that to somebody. That really showed her true Colors. When I’m stressed, I like walking, driving, reading and listening to music. Try to find something to keep your mind off of things. It will get better