Moving forward.

Hi, my name is Nicholas. As of today I will be leaving tomorrow to go live in a residential mental hospital. I’ll be gone for two months total. After years of being in depression recovery at a php level and a myriad of other programs nothing has ever worked in the slightest. All my past therapists and behavioral specialists can’t do anything for me. They tried but they are getting a little frustrated that I just don’t change. I do all the work, everything they say; I’m just so emotionless and numb, and my way of thinking is very rigid, logical, and black and white. My therapists are using residential as a last resort now. My concern is that once I finish residential, there is literally nothing else I can do if I don’t change. It makes me feel like giving up; I’m growing tired of therapy after years, which I hate to admit. I know the danger of giving up ; however, I will inevitably be put at a critical level of suicidal ideation. I’m not really sure why I decided to write this, But it just felt like the right thing to do. I guess I’ll be back on 7 cups in 2 months; not that anyone probably cares