@Aldforever First of all, you are NOT a burden! Your life is worth so much and you're full of potential. You know how I know that? Because your writing is beautiful. You have a way with words and can portray your experiences with such grace in your writing.
I'm so sorry for everything you've had to go through and if you ever need to talk to someone, feel free to message me. But know this: you are NOT a waste, worthless, or any label that anyone has put on you, because they don't know you nor do they know your potential. Don't give up on your life because of people who don't understand your greatness. And believe that you ARE great.
@Aldforever
I've known more than one person who has felt suicidal before (including myself) and eventually do feel better after seeking help professionally for it. Please, hold on because you won't know how much better it CAN get if you give up on everything. You are not alone.