Is there something going on that makes you need to make this decision right now? Why can't it wait?
Do you feel like letting us know what things led you to this decision? I'm sure you are in a lot of pain. You want the suffering to stop. Without knowing any details, I can let you know that I have been to the point, a few times, where I'd do anything to make the pain stop.
Your obvious pain deeply saddens me. I wish there were something I could say, or do; but I have nothing.
I can assure you that there are ways that make the pain stop being so intense all the time. It is not hopeless.
Please consider talking to someone.