Feeling empty, invalid, unnecessary.
Hello, I don't know very well how to start with this post ... I just feel empty, I feel like there is nothing for me... I am unemployed, I have not graduated from university, I have isolated myself from my friends and I only live day by day, one after another without feeling anything beyond the basic needs of a human being (food and sleep). I don't feel that "impetus" that makes people fight, seek something better for their lives. I feel absolutely nothing. I just want to sleep or be high on marijuana so I don't think about how little I am. I have some friends, I have my parents, but they do not know what happens to me, they see a happy woman, a daughter who is always present, but I feel so alone and so empty ... so unnecessary, a loss of space, of air, I am an unnecessary monetary expense. I have lost interest in many things, I notice it, I have been fading. I don't know if this is a request for help, I just wanted to communicate it, release it to the wind for someone, somewhere in the world, to read me. Thank you
Dearest @Overthinker88, I read every word you wrote, you are definitely not alone. I’m really sorry you are feeling the way you feel. Everyone of us has that kind of feelings every now and then, if not every day, but say nothing, or are okay with living a life that feels pointless to them. You, on the contrary, seem to me a very intelligent person. You can write your feelings. It’s not for everyone. You are by no means a waste of anything. You’re precious. I sense in you a lot of potential. There’s nothing wrong with a simple kind of life, but if you want more for yourself - I can see that, otherwise, you wouldn’t so boldly describe your anguish - please, take it easy. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You have your parents, food, a roof, a bed, you are blessed with that. It’s never too late to make plans, to find passions and interests. Perhaps, you could devote part of you time to write your heart out. I would read your blog if you had one 😊 Do, please, smell the flowers - it’s a cliche but it’s true. The world can be a wonderful place sometimes. Pamper yourself, go for walks, buy yourself some stuff - anything that can bring you some joy, on day at a time. I can relate. But if you suspect you are going through a mild depression, it wouldn’t hurt to see a doctor. Meds can help you stand on your feet again. Do please give this some thought. Wishing you all the best. You have value and courage. You’re precious and needed, don’t ever forget that 🌹🌸