Treatment resistant major depression disorder

@helpfulAvocado9437

I am in the same storm. I have been on and off antidepressants for decades. Tried different types, different dosages. Tried therapy. About a year ago I tried a new anti depressant. After months I felt no different, and they upped my dosage. Still nothing. And the longer I feel like I am swimming underwater, the less energy I have to keep trying to find a place where I feel hopeful. Like I just feel this sense of doom that this is my life, and I'll just wait it out, instead living it. I know this isn't a helpful message. This is my first time in this site. But I immediately related to your message, and it helped me feel less alone. I get it. 

Thank you so much for your detailed response. Good to know that I'm not alone. Very recently, i changed my psychiatrist. I'm now taking both psychotherapy & psychiatric advice from the same organization. This psychiatrist has now taken a completely new approach. He decided to stop all medicines for atleast two weeks and see how I'm feeling. He feels the medicines could actually be harming me instead of helping me. So I'm currently going through the tapering process for antidepressants and sleep tablets including benzos. This was started 10 days back. Now going through withdrawal symptoms - rebound insomnia. This is terrible. I'm sleeping only for 2 to 4hrs with wake ups in between. Only yesterday, i slept for 5 hrs.

Please do keep in touch as we seem to relate well to our similar problems.