Honest
Man, my whole life everyone else had control over my life but me. I don't want to get into details, but that's what made me try to find real happiness in video games and tv, but when that didn't work, it came down to porn. I didn't realize it at the time and hated admitting this, but a guy came into my life called Kid Cudi. He made me realize how this affected my family and myself. Sadly, my whole life I felt alone, I couldn't talk to my parents because they were very harsh, I cant even talk to my dad, because he doesn't really like the guy who I am, he just is forced to like me because I'm his son. I tried to be better, I couldn't I tried again, I couldn't. I realized that, 2 things hold me back, I cant change, 2 this music is the only thing that make me feel like I'm a part of something. I'm not lonely, I finally feel loved in this music. Either way I feel my life will be in flames.
@indigoHouse922 Hi There. First I want to say that it's great that you are starting to find yourself- even if others don't get it... it doesn't matter- you stay focused on your own compass heading because you'll need to live with yourself for a long time... you should enjoy yourself along the way.
As an old man with 2 older kids, I can tell you 2 things... 1) I suspect your parents love you even though they may not show it and 2) Parents make mistakes ALL THE TIME! and many are afraid to admit when they do, and they tend to hide it. Remember, just as you are learning how to be yourself, they are still learning how to be a parent. Mistakes happen.
So focus on the music, games and things that make you happy. Find others that share what you like. And eventually you will have control of all the aspects of your life... and when that happens, you'll be able to show your parents the whole, real you. And they may not understand it, but they will respect it.
Good Luck!!
