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Trying to understand myself

promqueen June 24th, 2021

Just barely found out I suffer from anxiety. Now it makes sense why I get chocked up around people who seem whole. I consistently compare myself to literally anyone as if there's a prize of who's better. I have the hardest time sleeping without smoking first. I'm too scared to call back a new friend that I really wanted a relationship with because I'm afraid that I'll disappear on them or disappoint them. At the same time , I try everyday not to be anxious! I say affirmations that bring me some good energy. I read for 30mins a day, and maintain my yoga exercises. But for some reason I'm still a big ol mess, and struggling with caring deeper about myself and other people. I don't even know how to focus on myself and what I'm feeling sometimes. I just run off auto pilot of being the best person I can be .. even if I don't know what I'm feeling or thinking. They say you can't be happy and sad at the same time, well I feel like that's what I am rn. How to I choose one to feel at a time? Humans emotions are so complex 🤧

1
Eudaimonia99 June 25th, 2021

@promqueen
Thanks for sharing with us. Sounds like consistently compare yourself and other people bring you hard times. Need to rely on smoking for relaxing and am scared to connect with friends. These are the signs of anxiety and lack of confidence. I can tell that you try hard to be the best version of yourself by reading and doing yoga. But still, confused about your own feeling. It is OK that you do not know how you feel right now. People figured out their lives along their life path by try and error. Practice mindfulness and living in the moment. When you find something that brings you joy, that will be your answer. Don't need to compare yourself with other people because YOU are you and that is fantastic! Hope you find peace in your mind.