Why am I having panic attacks?

Hi fellow people:-)

My name's Tehya and I'm 15 years old; i have been suffering from depression for about half of my life.

So basically this whole thing started about a month ago when i graduated from what i could only compare to junior high school (i live in switzerland and our school system is very strange) to our equivalent of high school (when you make it through the 4 years you can study). I've never been this happy at school before- my class is amazing and i have made some really good and real friends already. I havent felt depressed during school hours for a month now and for me that is amazing!

Now, about 3 weeks ago on a tuesday afternoon in the middle of math class, i suddenly got a panic attack. This has never happened to me at school before and i was especially surprised because there was absolutely no reason for it- even though i dont like math, i wasnt feeling stressed or depressed. So i had to sit through a whole math lesson in this horrible state of panic, merely able to breathe, and i felt like dying. It was a horrible experience for me as i didnt have anyone in my class i could talk to about it- no one knew about my mental health issues back then.

So after the panic attack was finally over, i acted like nothing happened and forgot about it, until 2 weeks later, also on a tuesday, i suddenly felt myself getting a panic attack again, this time in french class. I felt increasingly worried as again, there was no specific reason for the attack to happen and i had been feeling very well all week.

My overall feeling of content with my situation has decreased drastically because of these panic attacks, and i have started to feel depressed more often at school also because of the fear of getting another panic attack.

I have had panik attacks before, but maybe once a year, never in such short time distance. I wish i could go see a psychologist or a doctor, but i cant tell my mom about this; She herself has many mental disorders and doesnt "believe" that i have the "right" to be mentally ill so she ignores my mental health issues and gets very angry when i try to talk about them.

So, my question is, why is this happening to me? And what can i do against it?

Thank u for the help!

Tehya