Tired
It's been 6 years and I'm still the same, or worst, anxiety and panic attacks are making me get tired of living... I used to stay at home in the firsts years, no friends and drugged with pills, then i left all and started to go out, making exercises, socialize with friends and it's not helping. I'm ok in a moment and then the next I'm down, wanna stay alone or wanna go home, I started to ventilate, lose my breat and got really scare of dying. I know it's my brain, I've been in doctors since ever, i did everything, lot's of treatments, therapy and all, i know it's going to be a 15/30/45min of a crisis and i will be ok eventually, but still, it's killing me living like this. I don't want, i wanna be ok, be normal, enjoy my moments without thinking that it can start anytime... this is not living!!
Have you tried a 12 step program?
@heavenlyWinter I can imagine, having gone through panic attacks myself, that it can be too much, a sudden fear and a weird feeling overwhelming you and the fear of death, all this can be so much and so hard to deal with. There are moments of ups and downs but it just doesn't feel okay knowing that it's okay.