I'm feeling surprisingly hopeful

Last year was not a very good year for me. I was having really really bad problems with my anxiety and i just felt sad and like i was losing. I also felt a little suicidal. When i would walk home form school after th school day i would think of all the stuff i did or didn't do and it would make me feel just angry and anxouis. At one point the sidewalk stops and i cross the street. At the stop where the sidewalk stops i would stand there contemplating walking in front of a car as it flew by. I never did though. And now its the next school year and the built more sidewalk so i don't have to cross the street right away. This may sound dumb but i found that really symbolic and hopeful. the spot here i wanted to kill myself is not paved over and although i still have to cross the street i don't feel like going infront of a car. I had hard times last year but hts over and still mayhave hard times but i can handle them in a better way. All though may sound kind of dumb but it gives me a sense of hope and i hope it gave you hope too