Ex

@rene9250 Hi Rene, I've been wondering how you've been doing since we last spoke on your other thread. I'm sorry that today has been so difficult. I didn't realize that your anniversary was coming up. That just throws a whole bunch of additional emotions at you when things are confusing enough.

I know you said that you want to reach out but would you even know what you would want to say? Would you want to say that you miss him? That you're angry at him for tearing up the poster? Something else?

I know there is a forum on here dedicated to writing letters to ex's. It's therapuetic to express all those confusing feelings even if the other person never reads it. You're always welcome to share those thoughts here or on a simple piece of paper at home as well but I'll go see if I can find the other forum for you and link it here. Its a great coping technique when you find yourself wanting to reach out to an ex but you know you shouldn't.

@SecretlyMe

yes that would help a lot if I could talk on the ex forum...

I guess it's not helping me that I'm trying to distract myself with other guys... cause his love/attention was different.
Honestly, I wouldn't know what to say to him. I guess I still want him to be a part of my life but I know he's not the one as of now. I guess I wish and hope he will be the one in the future cause he's such a good person, but he didn't treat me the way I wanted. I just feel like I need to journal more or something and stop stalking his social media to see if he's going to do another petty thing. I just want the pain to stop, I just want to move on. I know that I'm a good person, a good girlfriend, I guess I'm just scared that I'll never find a good boyfriend because I never feel satisfied after months of being "in love," and I'm not sure if it's because I have high expectations? it's hard for me to stay in relationships past 6 months because I just become either sad or bored. It's an endless cycle.

@rene9250 I think it takes a while for the heart to catch up once our brain makes a decision. Our heads know that our exs aren't the ones for us. Our heads know that we shouldn't go back. But our heart just keeps missing them because it doesn't know any better. I'm sorry again that today has been confusing. Your heart just needs more time to understand what your head already knows.

You could be right that maybe you find yourself in this cycle. There's nothing wrong with wanting to learn and better ourselves after a breakup. Maybe this is something that you can keep exploring to see if there is a noticable way to break the pattern for future reference. But don't let it convince you that YOU were the one that sabotaged this last relationship. You said this ex didn't treat you right and that isn't something you should compromise on in the hopes to make a relationship last. You're doing the right thing You are strong and capable and you WILL get through this.

@SecretlyMe @rene9250

Here's the link https://www.7cups.com/forum/RelationshipFriendshipSupport_66/ALetterToMyEx_1036/

You aren't obligated to use it. But I hope you find it to be a helpful resource. You can participate by writing your own or take a look at the other letters that are already posted.

And like I offered the last time we spoke, I'm always here if you would like to chat. :)