Criticism

@Thewittle, I can so empathise. I'm a cryer too, and I wish I wasn't.

I also wonder, has this sensitivity to criticism always been the same way? Even as a child, was it hard for you to hear even gentle, constructive criticism that is framed with encouragement? And when you look around you at the main influences you had surrounding you growing up, parents, siblings, and those closest to you, were they people who had a tendency towards negativity, or complaining, or nitpicking/finding fault or blaming?

I am trying to examine some of these things within myself also, so it is helpful for me to think back to where the roots of the sensitivities lie. I think I may be a bit earlier on in my journey than you are though. I wish you lots of luck in your journey.

Hi there, thank you so much for your post. I'm a really sensitive person, so I emphasize with you on easily getting offended even if it is not intentional. As mentioned before, you are already taking huge steps by trying out different things and figuring out what works and what doesn't work. I commend you for having the courage to open up here about it. Please feel free to reach out to the listeners here if you ever wish to talk with someone. Take care, and I wish you the very best.

Hey it's been 7 years how are you? I'm also facing the same problem as you but I keep forgetting that I need to love and accept myself. I can't afford therapy so I'm here in this app it help me so much.

@Thewittle

"Perfectionism is the enemy of good."  -Voltaire

I think part of handling criticism is first understanding that it may be coming more from a place of insecurity on the criticizer's end. They project the insecurity on you because that is something they don't like seeing (and in some ways experiencing vicariously through you). That is not to say we shouldn't take helpful advice when applicable, but more like you have to be the gatekeeper if you think the criticism from others is coming from a well intentioned place or not. If you were criticized by your parents or caregivers consistently, and then on top of that are also criticized by your peers at present, that can feel like a cut on an already forming scar. It's too sensitive and only seems to reinforce the past. Hence the tears. 

I feel you here. I grew up with a Narcissistic parent. Nothing was ever good enough and I struggle with self doubt sometimes. Eventually, I saw those criticisms as more of his insecurities and lack of control being pushed on me. 

Sometimes we just gotta let ourselves be. You are lovable exactly as you are now, insecurities, flaws and all. If you are sensitive and cry, it's ok. You are carrying a lot and your body is trying to flush it out. Like when we go to the doctor and have a physical done. They test our reflexes to make sure they work. Crying is sort of like that. Shame is attached to crying when the other person can't handle their own feelings of discomfort.