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Fiancés Ex

BobbaFetta December 28th, 2021

My fiancé ex is dealing with bipolar disorder. I have been very empathetic in the past. However, in the past 2 years her behavior has becoming erratic. My fiancé and his ex have children together but he has custody. When he proposed to me, it seemed to trigger her even more.:Coming to our home, scratching our cars, jumping the fence to our yard, sending harassing messages using other peoples phone, Police, restraining orders, and cameras only calmed it down for a couple months…up until the order expired. Now my anxiety is such that I do not feel comfortable in my home. I’m always on guard & nervous. My anxiety is high & I’m not comfortable being alone. The only positive is, We will be moving in a few months. Any advice?? I am being too irrational?

2
halcyonCloud2036 December 29th, 2021

@BobbaFetta

I am so sorry that you have to deal with all of this....relationships are difficult enough on their own, but to have an ex in the picture who causes so much chaos and stress is not easy.

It does not sound like you are being irrational at all, but maybe since she is now more used to the idea that you are in this relationship, things will stay calm. I would still keep my guard up, but hope that she has moved on to letting you and your fiance live your life.

Sending you hugs and wishes for all the best ❤️

1 reply
BobbaFetta OP December 29th, 2021

Thank you so much for your words. I hoped after 3 years she would FINALLY get use to the idea. That is why I keep pushing our wedding back. My anxiety makes me feel like on our wedding day she will do something to ruin it. I’m thankful for my friends and fiancé, but I feel like I’m constantly talking about this situation and my anxiety it’s embarrassing. They don’t complain, and offer support, it’s just my fear.:As well as my fiancé blaming himself for putting us through this.:I will definitely keep my guard up, I just want peace and normalcy. My step sons always tell me, not to worry, she has problems and can’t get over their dad moving on. They’ve been apart for over 8 years, she been in and out of relations during and after their relationship. I don’t get it, but maybe it’s not meant for me to get it.

I hope all is going well for you, happy holidays.

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