I have terrible social anxiety, to the point I don’t think my friends like to be around me anymore
The caption kind of says it all. I don’t do well in crowded places, I don’t loud noise, I don’t like shopping. I love to go out and just walk or be places, but talking isn’t my strong suit. I’m much more of a nature enjoyer, I like to draw and hike. My friends are all the opposite—they love going to social events, throwing parties, and going thrifting in the city.
Lately, my friends have been planning events without me. Things that range from going to art festivals or simple coffee shop hangouts. They’re always in the phone together and I know they have a group chat without me, because they’re always making plans that I never hear about. It definitely hurts, but I don’t have the heart to intrude on them if I’m not invited.
This weekend, they have a weekend trip planned a few hours drive away at the beach. I’m invited for Saturday because it was the only day I could afford without hotel. But my parents heard about it and offered to pay for me, and urged me to try and be apart of the second day’s plans. I don’t know what they are, but when bringing it up to my friend group, it sounded like me tagging along would be real pain to them. They of course told me that I’m invited and all, but I could tell in their tone that they may have been annoyed with the sudden change.
Or maybe I’m overthinking it. I don’t know. I’ve always felt like I don’t fit in with them. I want to tell them I can do my own thing if it’s really an inconvenience to them. But I feel like I’ll get the same dismissive response.
this was definitely more of a rant than something to ask. I just don’t really have anyone to talk to about it.
@parivolans
There is no harm in saying something to your friend group saying you are free and want to try doing more things even out of your comfort zone. Have you said NO before to things that are not your style or complained when out doing something that was not your type of thing? I will say when we say no a few times the invitations slow or sometimes even stop.
What is the worse they can say " we had not invited because in the past you did not like this type of thing" or " you said you were not into what we have planned". If this type of thing is said it opens the door to discussion ... maybe you rethinking if you want to try more things they like or suggest/ organize plans that are more your style and invite them.
